Wisdom of the ages: 25 lessons from life

1. Forgiveness is giving up my right to hate you for hurting me.

2. Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.

3. To let a fool kiss you is stupid, to let a kiss fool you is worse.

4. Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't.

5. Mathematics teachers call retirement 'the aftermath'.

6. Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.

7. Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway.

8. My wife and I always compromise. I admit I'm wrong and she agrees with me.

9. Those who can't laugh at themselves leave the job to others.

10. Foreign aid is the transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries.

11. Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.

12. A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.

13. You're getting old when you enjoy remembering things more than doing them.

14. It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.

15. Early to bed, early to rise, your girl goes out with other guys.

16. Real friends are the ones who survive transitions between address books.

17. Saving is the best thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.

18. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is husband !

19. Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something.

20. They said we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried - but they wanted cash.

21. A child's greatest period of growth is the month after you've purchased new school uniforms.

22. Don't marry the person you want to live with, marry the one you cannot live without... but whatever you do, you'll regret it later.

23. You can't buy love . . but you pay heavily for it.

24. True friends stab you in the front.

25. They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom gets to speak.