Random Email Forwards

In these troubled times, here are some of the best ones doing the rounds:

- What's the definition of optimism? An investment banker who irons five shirts on a Sunday evening.

- What is the capital of Iceland? About $3.50

- I tried to get cash from an ATM today, but it said "insufficient funds." I don't know if that meant them or me.

- What's the difference between an investment banker and a large pizza? The pizza can still feed a family of four.

- What does a hedge-fund manager with no fund to manage say? Would you like fries with that sir?

- The credit crunch is getting bad, isn't it? I mean, I let my brother borrow 10 bucks a couple weeks back. It turns out I'm now America's fourth-biggest lender.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

VIDEO: Lessons in Americanism from Wasilla

4 mts 47 secs

Sunday, October 19, 2008

VIDEO: Sarah Palin visits SNL

5 mts 13 secs

3 mts 03 secs

Saturday, October 18, 2008

VIDEO: Ultimate Roast

McCain and Obama at the Al Smith dinner at Waldorf Astoria in New York.

14 mts 53 secs

McCain

13 mts 39 secs

Obama

Thursday, October 16, 2008

VIDEO: John McCain's Biblical Life

6 mts 39 secs

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Osama bin Laden's Plan to Bankrupt America Going Pretty Well These Days

http://blog.indecision2008.com/2008/10/10/osama-bin-ladens-plan-to-bankrupt-america-going-pretty-well-these-days/

Osama bin Laden -- terrorist, wedding poet and all-around jerkoff -- has announced his plans for destroying America through economic strangulation.

Well, he released it four years ago, just a few days before the 2004 presidential elections. How do you think that's working out for him?

"We are continuing this policy in bleeding America to the point of bankruptcy.
Allah willing, and nothing is too great for Allah," bin Laden said in the
transcript.

One thing you gotta admit about this guy: He can go fuck himself, but, ya know, he does get stuff done.

He said the mujahedeen fighters did the same thing to the Soviet Union in
Afghanistan in the 1980s, "using guerrilla warfare and the war of attrition to
fight tyrannical superpowers."

Which is exactly why we need to stay in Iraq until we do something that can possibly be defined as "winning." Even if we have to bleed ourselves to the point of bankruptcy fighting the insurgents' guerrilla warfare in this war of attrition. So that this asshole bin Laden doesn't win. How do you not understand this, people?!

Of course, there was no way that bin Laden's conveniently well-timed taunting videotape was in any way intended to sway the election in accordance with idiot voters' basest instincts. Because, why would he possibly want another four years of tough-fighting Republican rule in the U.S.?

He also said al Qaeda has found it "easy for us to provoke and bait this
administration."

"All that we have to do is to send two mujahedeen to
the furthest point east to raise a piece of cloth on which is written al Qaeda,
in order to make generals race there to cause America to suffer human, economic
and political losses without their achieving anything of note other than some
benefits for their private corporations," bin Laden said.

How much you wanna bet that, sometime in the next two weeks, new footage suddenly emerges of bin Laden wearing a Hope t-shirt? (Don't take that bet.)

I can't wait for November 5th -- after John McCain has been elected president -- when McCain can finally release his super secret Osama bin Laden and Muhajadeen Spectacular Wondrifical Killing Machine and send it to the Gates of Hell so that we can get rid of bin Laden once and for all and start focusing on the real problems America faces today: '60s radical community organizers and people who think gay people should be allowed to get married.

I just hope it doesn't run on gas.

'Cause then we're fucked.