Slope 45
10 years ago
Friday, March 09, 2007
Monday, March 05, 2007
Aisa bhi hota hai...
This happened about a month ago near Lonavala.
A guy was driving from Mumbai to Pune and decided not to take the new expressway as he wants to see the scenery. The inevitable happens and when he reaches the ghats his car breaks down - he's stranded miles from nowhere.
Having no choice he starts walking on the side of the road, hoping to get a lift to the nearest town. It's dark and raining. And pretty soon he's wet and shivering. The night rolls on and no car goes by, the rain is so heavy he can hardly see a few feet ahead of him.
Suddenly he sees a car coming towards him. It slows and then stops next to him - without thinking the guy opens the door and jumps in.
Seated in the back, he leans forward to thank the person who had saved him - when he realizes there is nobody behind the wheel!!!
Even though there's no one in the front seat and no sound of any engine, the car starts moving slowly. The guy looks at the road ahead and sees a curve coming. Scared almost to death he starts to pray, begging the Lord for his life. He hasn't come out of shock, when just before he hits the curve, a hand appears through the window and moves the wheel!
The car makes the curve safely and continues on the road to the next bend. The guy, now paralyzed in terror, watches how the hand appears every time they are before a curve and moves the steering wheel just enough to get the car around each bend.
Finally, the guy sees lights ahead. Gathering his courage he wrenches open the door of the silent, slowly moving car, scrambles out and runs as hard as he can towards the lights. It's a small town. He stumbles into a dhaba, and asks for a drink, and breaks down. Then he starts talking about the horrible experience he's just been through.
There is dead silence in the dhaba when he stops talking .....
and that's when Santa and Banta Singh walk into the dhaba. Santa points and says "Look Banta - that's the weird guy who got into our car when we were pushing it."
A guy was driving from Mumbai to Pune and decided not to take the new expressway as he wants to see the scenery. The inevitable happens and when he reaches the ghats his car breaks down - he's stranded miles from nowhere.
Having no choice he starts walking on the side of the road, hoping to get a lift to the nearest town. It's dark and raining. And pretty soon he's wet and shivering. The night rolls on and no car goes by, the rain is so heavy he can hardly see a few feet ahead of him.
Suddenly he sees a car coming towards him. It slows and then stops next to him - without thinking the guy opens the door and jumps in.
Seated in the back, he leans forward to thank the person who had saved him - when he realizes there is nobody behind the wheel!!!
Even though there's no one in the front seat and no sound of any engine, the car starts moving slowly. The guy looks at the road ahead and sees a curve coming. Scared almost to death he starts to pray, begging the Lord for his life. He hasn't come out of shock, when just before he hits the curve, a hand appears through the window and moves the wheel!
The car makes the curve safely and continues on the road to the next bend. The guy, now paralyzed in terror, watches how the hand appears every time they are before a curve and moves the steering wheel just enough to get the car around each bend.
Finally, the guy sees lights ahead. Gathering his courage he wrenches open the door of the silent, slowly moving car, scrambles out and runs as hard as he can towards the lights. It's a small town. He stumbles into a dhaba, and asks for a drink, and breaks down. Then he starts talking about the horrible experience he's just been through.
There is dead silence in the dhaba when he stops talking .....
and that's when Santa and Banta Singh walk into the dhaba. Santa points and says "Look Banta - that's the weird guy who got into our car when we were pushing it."
Thursday, March 01, 2007
Chuck Norris Facts
1. Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris.
2. Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete.
3. Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the fuck he wants.
4. Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.
5. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
6. Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
7. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
8. Chuck Norris was originally cast as the main character in 24, but was replaced by the producers when he managed to kill every terrorist and save the day in 12 minutes and 37 seconds.
9. Chuck Norris can speak braille.
10. Once, while having sex in a tractor-trailer, part of Chuck Norris' sperm escaped and got into the engine. We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.
11. If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Chuck Norris?" It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance.
12. Chuck Norris owns the greatest Poker Face of all-time. It helped him win the 1983 World Series of Poker despite him holding just a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game Uno.
13. Chuck Norris once won a game of Connect Four in 3 moves.
14. Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".
15. Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
16. On a high school math test, Chuck Norris put down "Violence" as every one of the answers. He got an A+ on the test because Chuck Norris solves all his problems with Violence.
17. Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
18. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
19. Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
20. Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
21. Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
22. Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors.
23. Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas.
24. Giraffes were created when Chuck Norris uppercutted a horse.
25. If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Chuck Norris says its beef, then it's fucking beef.
26. Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
27. If you play Led Zeppelin's "Stairway to Heaven" backwards, you will hear Chuck Norris banging your sister.
28. Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
29. When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
30. Chuck Norris secretly sleeps with every woman in the world once a month. They bleed for a week as a result.
31. Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
32. Chuck Norris doesn't have hair on his testicles, because hair does not grow on steel.
33. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
34. Chuck Norris' dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Chuck Norris will not take shit from anyone.
35. The best part of waking up is not Folgers in your cup, but knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.
36. Chuck Norris doesn't pop his collar, his shirts just get erections when they touch his body.
37. Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
38. Chuck Norris is always on top during sex because Chuck Norris never fucks up.
39. Chuck Norris is the only person on the planet that can kick you in the back of the face.
40. Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.
41. Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris' PC will crash.
42. Chuck Norris has to maintain a concealed weapon license in all 50 states in order to legally wear pants.
43. Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.
44. Chuck Norris plays russian roulette with a fully loded revolver... and wins.
45. Mr. T once defeated Chuck Norris in a game of Tic-Tac-Toe. In retaliation, Chuck Norris invented racism.
46. Chuck Norris likes to knit sweaters in his free time. And by "knit", I mean "kick", and by "sweaters", I mean "babies".
47. Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris.
48. Chuck Norris once bowled a 300. Without a ball. He wasn't even in a bowling alley.
49. Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murdered in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
50. Death once had a near-Chuck-Norris experience.
51. The reason newborn babies cry is because they know they have just entered a world with Chuck Norris.
52. Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a fucking Jeep.
53. Chuck Norris never retreats, he just attacks in the opposite direction.
54. Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
55. Chuck Norris once punched a man in the soul.
56. M.C. Hammer learned the hard way that Chuck Norris can touch this.
57. Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
58. It is considered a great accomplishment to go down Niagara Falls in a wooden barrel. Chuck Norris can go up Niagara Falls in a cardboard box.
59. When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off.
60. When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.
61. Rosa Parks refused to get out of her seat because she was saving it for Chuck Norris.
62. Chuck Norris doesn't use pickup lines, he simply says, "Now."
63. A rogue squirrel once challenged Chuck Norris to a nut hunt around the park. Before beginning, Chuck simply dropped his pants, instantly killing the squirrel and 3 small children. Chuck knows you can't find bigger, better nuts than that.
64. Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Chuck Norris can throw Brett Favre even further.
65. Chuck Norris once had a heart attack; his heart lost.
66. Chuck Norris doesn't need a miracle in order to split the ocean. He just walks in and the water gets the fuck out of the way.
67. Chuck Norris can make a paraplegic run for his life.
68. Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, but Jack still couldn't dodge Chuck Norris' roundhouse kick.
69. A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
70. Chuck Norris is currently in a legal battle with the makers of Bubble Tape. Norris claims "6 Feet of Fun" is actually the trademark for his penis.
71. The last digit of pi is Chuck Norris. He is the end of all things.
72. The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
73. Chuck Norris can create a rock so heavy that even he can't lift it. And then he lifts it anyways, just to show you who the fuck Chuck Norris is.
74. Chuck Norris was originally offered the role as Frodo in Lord of the Rings. He declined because, "Only a pussy would need three movies to destroy a piece of jewelery.
75. The phrase, "You are what you eat" cannot be true based on the amount of pussy Chuck Norris eats.
76. The only time Chuck Norris was wrong was when he thought he had made a mistake.
77. Pinatas were made in an attempt to get Chuck Norris to stop kicking the people of Mexico. Sadly this backfired, as all it has resulted in is Chuck Norris now looking for candy after he kicks his victims.
78. When God said, "Let there be light", Chuck Norris said, "say please"
79. Chuck Norris can tie his shoes with his feet.
80. Chuck Norris once had an erection while lying face down and struck oil.
81. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
82. Chuck Norris does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.
83. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
84. The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris's fist.
85. Upon hearing that his good friend, Lance Armstrong, lost his testicles to cancer, Chuck Norris donated one of his to Lance. With just one of Chuck's nuts, Lance was able to win the Tour De France seven times. By the way, Chuck still has two testicles; either he was able to produce a new one simply by flexing, or he had three to begin with. No one knows for sure.
86. Before Chuck Norris was born, the martial arts weapons with two pieces of wood connected by a chain were called NunBarrys. No one ever did find out what happened to Barry.
87. Chuck Norris used to beat the shit out of his shadow because it was following to close. It now stands a safe 30 feet behind him.
88. Chuck Norris doesn't play "hide-and-seek." He plays "hide-and-pray-I-don't-find-you".
89. Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.
90. Most men are okay with their wives fantasizing about Chuck Norris during sex, because they are doing the same thing.
91. The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real, it's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
92. Chuck Norris cannot predict the future; the future just better fucking do what Chuck Norris.
93. Bullets dodge Chuck Norris.
94. Chuck Norris once finished "The Song that Never Ends"
95. The only reason Chuck Norris didn't win an Oscar for his performance in "Sidekicks" is because nobody in their right mind would willingly give Chuck Norris a blunt metal object. That's just suicide.
96. We all know the magic word is please. As in the sentence, "Please don't kill me." Too bad Chuck Norris doesn't believe in magic.
97. The most honorable way of dying is taking a bullet for Chuck Norris. This amuses Chuck Norris because he is bulletproof.
98. The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
99. Chuck Norris is the only person that can punch a cyclops between the eye.
100. Chuck Norris keeps his ID on the bottom of his right foot. Nobody ever asks him for his ID.
2. Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete.
3. Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the fuck he wants.
4. Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.
5. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
6. Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
7. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
8. Chuck Norris was originally cast as the main character in 24, but was replaced by the producers when he managed to kill every terrorist and save the day in 12 minutes and 37 seconds.
9. Chuck Norris can speak braille.
10. Once, while having sex in a tractor-trailer, part of Chuck Norris' sperm escaped and got into the engine. We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.
11. If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Chuck Norris?" It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance.
12. Chuck Norris owns the greatest Poker Face of all-time. It helped him win the 1983 World Series of Poker despite him holding just a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game Uno.
13. Chuck Norris once won a game of Connect Four in 3 moves.
14. Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".
15. Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
16. On a high school math test, Chuck Norris put down "Violence" as every one of the answers. He got an A+ on the test because Chuck Norris solves all his problems with Violence.
17. Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
18. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
19. Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
20. Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
21. Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
22. Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors.
23. Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas.
24. Giraffes were created when Chuck Norris uppercutted a horse.
25. If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Chuck Norris says its beef, then it's fucking beef.
26. Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
27. If you play Led Zeppelin's "Stairway to Heaven" backwards, you will hear Chuck Norris banging your sister.
28. Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
29. When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
30. Chuck Norris secretly sleeps with every woman in the world once a month. They bleed for a week as a result.
31. Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
32. Chuck Norris doesn't have hair on his testicles, because hair does not grow on steel.
33. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
34. Chuck Norris' dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Chuck Norris will not take shit from anyone.
35. The best part of waking up is not Folgers in your cup, but knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.
36. Chuck Norris doesn't pop his collar, his shirts just get erections when they touch his body.
37. Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
38. Chuck Norris is always on top during sex because Chuck Norris never fucks up.
39. Chuck Norris is the only person on the planet that can kick you in the back of the face.
40. Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.
41. Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris' PC will crash.
42. Chuck Norris has to maintain a concealed weapon license in all 50 states in order to legally wear pants.
43. Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.
44. Chuck Norris plays russian roulette with a fully loded revolver... and wins.
45. Mr. T once defeated Chuck Norris in a game of Tic-Tac-Toe. In retaliation, Chuck Norris invented racism.
46. Chuck Norris likes to knit sweaters in his free time. And by "knit", I mean "kick", and by "sweaters", I mean "babies".
47. Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris.
48. Chuck Norris once bowled a 300. Without a ball. He wasn't even in a bowling alley.
49. Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murdered in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
50. Death once had a near-Chuck-Norris experience.
51. The reason newborn babies cry is because they know they have just entered a world with Chuck Norris.
52. Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a fucking Jeep.
53. Chuck Norris never retreats, he just attacks in the opposite direction.
54. Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
55. Chuck Norris once punched a man in the soul.
56. M.C. Hammer learned the hard way that Chuck Norris can touch this.
57. Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
58. It is considered a great accomplishment to go down Niagara Falls in a wooden barrel. Chuck Norris can go up Niagara Falls in a cardboard box.
59. When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off.
60. When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.
61. Rosa Parks refused to get out of her seat because she was saving it for Chuck Norris.
62. Chuck Norris doesn't use pickup lines, he simply says, "Now."
63. A rogue squirrel once challenged Chuck Norris to a nut hunt around the park. Before beginning, Chuck simply dropped his pants, instantly killing the squirrel and 3 small children. Chuck knows you can't find bigger, better nuts than that.
64. Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Chuck Norris can throw Brett Favre even further.
65. Chuck Norris once had a heart attack; his heart lost.
66. Chuck Norris doesn't need a miracle in order to split the ocean. He just walks in and the water gets the fuck out of the way.
67. Chuck Norris can make a paraplegic run for his life.
68. Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, but Jack still couldn't dodge Chuck Norris' roundhouse kick.
69. A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
70. Chuck Norris is currently in a legal battle with the makers of Bubble Tape. Norris claims "6 Feet of Fun" is actually the trademark for his penis.
71. The last digit of pi is Chuck Norris. He is the end of all things.
72. The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
73. Chuck Norris can create a rock so heavy that even he can't lift it. And then he lifts it anyways, just to show you who the fuck Chuck Norris is.
74. Chuck Norris was originally offered the role as Frodo in Lord of the Rings. He declined because, "Only a pussy would need three movies to destroy a piece of jewelery.
75. The phrase, "You are what you eat" cannot be true based on the amount of pussy Chuck Norris eats.
76. The only time Chuck Norris was wrong was when he thought he had made a mistake.
77. Pinatas were made in an attempt to get Chuck Norris to stop kicking the people of Mexico. Sadly this backfired, as all it has resulted in is Chuck Norris now looking for candy after he kicks his victims.
78. When God said, "Let there be light", Chuck Norris said, "say please"
79. Chuck Norris can tie his shoes with his feet.
80. Chuck Norris once had an erection while lying face down and struck oil.
81. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
82. Chuck Norris does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.
83. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
84. The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris's fist.
85. Upon hearing that his good friend, Lance Armstrong, lost his testicles to cancer, Chuck Norris donated one of his to Lance. With just one of Chuck's nuts, Lance was able to win the Tour De France seven times. By the way, Chuck still has two testicles; either he was able to produce a new one simply by flexing, or he had three to begin with. No one knows for sure.
86. Before Chuck Norris was born, the martial arts weapons with two pieces of wood connected by a chain were called NunBarrys. No one ever did find out what happened to Barry.
87. Chuck Norris used to beat the shit out of his shadow because it was following to close. It now stands a safe 30 feet behind him.
88. Chuck Norris doesn't play "hide-and-seek." He plays "hide-and-pray-I-don't-find-you".
89. Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.
90. Most men are okay with their wives fantasizing about Chuck Norris during sex, because they are doing the same thing.
91. The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real, it's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
92. Chuck Norris cannot predict the future; the future just better fucking do what Chuck Norris.
93. Bullets dodge Chuck Norris.
94. Chuck Norris once finished "The Song that Never Ends"
95. The only reason Chuck Norris didn't win an Oscar for his performance in "Sidekicks" is because nobody in their right mind would willingly give Chuck Norris a blunt metal object. That's just suicide.
96. We all know the magic word is please. As in the sentence, "Please don't kill me." Too bad Chuck Norris doesn't believe in magic.
97. The most honorable way of dying is taking a bullet for Chuck Norris. This amuses Chuck Norris because he is bulletproof.
98. The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
99. Chuck Norris is the only person that can punch a cyclops between the eye.
100. Chuck Norris keeps his ID on the bottom of his right foot. Nobody ever asks him for his ID.
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
In search of God
An American decided to write a book about famous churches around the world.
So he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to China.
On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs when he noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read "$10,000 per call".
The American, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what the telephone was used for.
The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God.
The American thanked the priest and went along his way.
Next stop was in Japan. There, at a very large cathedral, he saw the same golden telephone with the same sign under it.
He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in China and he asked a nearby nun what its purpose was.
She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 he could talk to God.
"O.K., thank you," said the American.
He then traveled to Pakistan , Srilanka , Russia , Germany and France.
In every church he saw the same golden telephone with the same "$10,000 Per call" sign under it. The American, upon leaving Vermont decided to travel to up to India to see if Indians had the same phone.
He arrived in India , and again, in the first church he entered, there Was the same golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read "One Rupee per call."
The American was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign, "Father, I've traveled all over World and I've seen this same golden Telephone in many churches. I'm told that it is a direct line to Heaven, But in the US the price was $10,000 per call. Why is it so cheap here?"
The priest smiled and answered, "You're in India now, Son - it's a Local Call".
This is the only heaven on the Earth.
So he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to China.
On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs when he noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read "$10,000 per call".
The American, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what the telephone was used for.
The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God.
The American thanked the priest and went along his way.
Next stop was in Japan. There, at a very large cathedral, he saw the same golden telephone with the same sign under it.
He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in China and he asked a nearby nun what its purpose was.
She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 he could talk to God.
"O.K., thank you," said the American.
He then traveled to Pakistan , Srilanka , Russia , Germany and France.
In every church he saw the same golden telephone with the same "$10,000 Per call" sign under it. The American, upon leaving Vermont decided to travel to up to India to see if Indians had the same phone.
He arrived in India , and again, in the first church he entered, there Was the same golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read "One Rupee per call."
The American was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign, "Father, I've traveled all over World and I've seen this same golden Telephone in many churches. I'm told that it is a direct line to Heaven, But in the US the price was $10,000 per call. Why is it so cheap here?"
The priest smiled and answered, "You're in India now, Son - it's a Local Call".
This is the only heaven on the Earth.
Sunday, February 18, 2007
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