Slope 45
10 years ago
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Sunday, February 19, 2006
VIDEO: Russell Peters in New York City
58 mts 37 secs
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
Full hour of Russell Peters' side-splitting show at New York's desi comedy club.
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
Full hour of Russell Peters' side-splitting show at New York's desi comedy club.
Thursday, February 09, 2006
Some really good advice before you leave home this morning
Am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me, and we could all do with a little calm.
By following the simple advice I read in an article, I have finally found inner peace.
The article read: "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish off all the things you have started".
So I looked round the house to see all the things I had started and hadn't finished .......
And before leaving the house this morning I finished off a bottle of red wine, a bottle of white wine, the Baileys, three Bacardi Breezers, the Jack Daniels, the Prozac, some Valium, some cheesecake and a box of chocolates.
You have no idea how bloody good I feel.
You might like to pass this on to those you feel are in need of inner peace.
By following the simple advice I read in an article, I have finally found inner peace.
The article read: "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish off all the things you have started".
So I looked round the house to see all the things I had started and hadn't finished .......
And before leaving the house this morning I finished off a bottle of red wine, a bottle of white wine, the Baileys, three Bacardi Breezers, the Jack Daniels, the Prozac, some Valium, some cheesecake and a box of chocolates.
You have no idea how bloody good I feel.
You might like to pass this on to those you feel are in need of inner peace.
Wednesday, February 08, 2006
Poem: Around the corner I have a friend
Around the corner I have a friend,
In this great city that has no end,
Yet the days go by and weeks rush on,
And before I know it, a year is gone.
And I never see my old friends face,
For life is a swift and terrible race,
He knows I like him just as well,
As in the days when I rang his bell.
And he rang mine but we were younger then,
And now we are busy, tired men.
Tired of playing a foolish game,
Tired of trying to make a name.
"Tomorrow" I say! "I will call on Jim
Just to show that I'm thinking of him."
But tomorrow comes and tomorrow goes,
And distance between us grows and grows.
Around the corner, yet miles away,
"Here's a telegram sir," "Jim died today."
And that's what we get and deserve in the end.
Around the corner, a vanished friend.
In this great city that has no end,
Yet the days go by and weeks rush on,
And before I know it, a year is gone.
And I never see my old friends face,
For life is a swift and terrible race,
He knows I like him just as well,
As in the days when I rang his bell.
And he rang mine but we were younger then,
And now we are busy, tired men.
Tired of playing a foolish game,
Tired of trying to make a name.
"Tomorrow" I say! "I will call on Jim
Just to show that I'm thinking of him."
But tomorrow comes and tomorrow goes,
And distance between us grows and grows.
Around the corner, yet miles away,
"Here's a telegram sir," "Jim died today."
And that's what we get and deserve in the end.
Around the corner, a vanished friend.
VIDEO: George Bush Fights for Peace
1 mt 53 secs
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Allow the controller to load above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
President Bush speaks out for peace. More power to the art of video editing!
A warning will appear. Click OK to allow the ActiveX control required to play this video.
Allow the controller to load above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
President Bush speaks out for peace. More power to the art of video editing!
Monday, February 06, 2006
The best blonde joke ever!
This one's gotta be the best blonde joke ever: http://j-walkblog.com/index.php?/weblog/posts/blond_joke/
Saturday, February 04, 2006
AUDIO: Jungle Jungle Baat Chali Hai
Yes! The title song from The Jungle Book. Enjoy!
1 mts 28 secs
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
1 mts 28 secs
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
Being Discrete
Cross my heart this happened to someone. This guy lives in Westchester, NY and goes to school at Ithaca College. For two years, he has wanted to ask a certain girl (who is also from Westchester and also goes to Ithaca) out on a date, but has never had the courage.
Finally, one day over the summer, he sees her at home and musters up the courage to ask her out. She accepts, and they make dinner plans for Saturday night.
Friday night, this guy goes out with all of his buddies, and drinks like Prohibition is coming back.
Saturday, he is in such bad shape that he can't make it through twenty minutes without either throwing up or using the bathroom. After several hours of this, he is able to stop throwing up, but he is still running to the toilet every 20 minutes. He doesn't want to cancel the date, because he's afraid he won't ever talk to her again.
So they meet in Westchester, and take the train to New York City (about a 30 minute ride). They get to the restaurant, and he excuses himself during the appetizers to use the bathroom. They enjoy the rest of the appetizers without interruption, but he has to go back again during the entrees.
They decide to get dessert. During dessert, our hero feels another rumbling, but doesn't want to look like a complete bathroom freak, so he holds it. After a few minutes, the rumbling subsides, but he still has a bit of gas stored up.
He decides to let this little bit of gas fly right there at the table (discreetly, of course). Unfortunately, this little bit of gas came with another little surprise. "Oh crap," he thinks (and feels). Instead of running to the bathroom right away, our hero immediately leans on the arms of his chair to keep from sitting on this surprise. He maintains this yoga position for the rest of dessert, trying to figure out what to do before his tan pants (a) start to smell, or (b) start to show stains on the outside. He quickly pays for dinner and they leave the restaurant. Oh, by the way, he is walking like a cowboy.
On the way to the train station, they pass the Gap.
Do you mind if I run in and buy a sweater that I was looking at last week?" he asks.
"No problem, I'd like to look around too," she replies. They go into the Gap. Fortunately, at the Gap, men's fashions are on the right, women's fashions are on the left. They split up.
Our hero grabs the first sweater within reach, and hurries back to the khakis. After selecting a pair that most closely resemble his current outfit, he brings both items to the register. His eyes are on his date (still on the other side of the store) to make sure that she doesn't see him buying the pants. He doesn't even want the sweater, so he says through clenched teeth (just in case his date can read lips from 40 feet away) "Just the pants."
"What?" asks the Gap girl.
"Just the pants!" (Eyes still trained on his date.)
Gap girl: "Oh, OK."
He pays for the pants and walks over to his date; then they leave the store. They board the train just before it leaves the station and find two seats in the middle of the car. Without sitting down, our hero excuses himself and walks to the bathroom in the back of the car. He gets to the bathroom as the train departs, and quickly rips off his pants and boxer shorts. He rolls them into a ball and throws them out the window. After cleaning himself off, he opens the Gap bag and pulls out...just the sweater.
Finally, one day over the summer, he sees her at home and musters up the courage to ask her out. She accepts, and they make dinner plans for Saturday night.
Friday night, this guy goes out with all of his buddies, and drinks like Prohibition is coming back.
Saturday, he is in such bad shape that he can't make it through twenty minutes without either throwing up or using the bathroom. After several hours of this, he is able to stop throwing up, but he is still running to the toilet every 20 minutes. He doesn't want to cancel the date, because he's afraid he won't ever talk to her again.
So they meet in Westchester, and take the train to New York City (about a 30 minute ride). They get to the restaurant, and he excuses himself during the appetizers to use the bathroom. They enjoy the rest of the appetizers without interruption, but he has to go back again during the entrees.
They decide to get dessert. During dessert, our hero feels another rumbling, but doesn't want to look like a complete bathroom freak, so he holds it. After a few minutes, the rumbling subsides, but he still has a bit of gas stored up.
He decides to let this little bit of gas fly right there at the table (discreetly, of course). Unfortunately, this little bit of gas came with another little surprise. "Oh crap," he thinks (and feels). Instead of running to the bathroom right away, our hero immediately leans on the arms of his chair to keep from sitting on this surprise. He maintains this yoga position for the rest of dessert, trying to figure out what to do before his tan pants (a) start to smell, or (b) start to show stains on the outside. He quickly pays for dinner and they leave the restaurant. Oh, by the way, he is walking like a cowboy.
On the way to the train station, they pass the Gap.
Do you mind if I run in and buy a sweater that I was looking at last week?" he asks.
"No problem, I'd like to look around too," she replies. They go into the Gap. Fortunately, at the Gap, men's fashions are on the right, women's fashions are on the left. They split up.
Our hero grabs the first sweater within reach, and hurries back to the khakis. After selecting a pair that most closely resemble his current outfit, he brings both items to the register. His eyes are on his date (still on the other side of the store) to make sure that she doesn't see him buying the pants. He doesn't even want the sweater, so he says through clenched teeth (just in case his date can read lips from 40 feet away) "Just the pants."
"What?" asks the Gap girl.
"Just the pants!" (Eyes still trained on his date.)
Gap girl: "Oh, OK."
He pays for the pants and walks over to his date; then they leave the store. They board the train just before it leaves the station and find two seats in the middle of the car. Without sitting down, our hero excuses himself and walks to the bathroom in the back of the car. He gets to the bathroom as the train departs, and quickly rips off his pants and boxer shorts. He rolls them into a ball and throws them out the window. After cleaning himself off, he opens the Gap bag and pulls out...just the sweater.
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
Hilarious News Headlines of 2005
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted
Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case
Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents
Farmer Bill Dies in House
Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
Stud Tires Out
Prostitutes Appeal to Pope
Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
Soviet Virgin Lands Short of Goal Again
British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands
Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms
Eye Drops off Shelf
Teacher Strikes Idle Kids
Reagan Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead
Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim
Shot Off Woman's Leg Helps Nicklaus to 66
Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax
Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told
Miners Refuse to Work after Death
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
Stolen Painting Found by Tree
Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies
Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years in Checkout Counter
Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years
Never Withhold Herpes Infection from Loved One
Drunken Drivers Paid $1000 in `84
War Dims Hope for Peace
If Strike isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While
Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge
Deer Kill 17,000
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy
Arson Suspect is Held in Massachusetts Fire
British Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply
Ban On Soliciting Dead in Trotwood
Lansing Residents Can Drop Off Trees
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
New Vaccine May Contain Rabies
Man Minus Ear Waives Hearing
Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing
Air Head Fired
Steals Clock, Faces Time
Prosecutor Releases Probe into Undersheriff
Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumni
Bank Drive-in Window Blocked by Board
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
Some Pieces of Rock Hudson Sold at Auction
Sex Education Delayed, Teachers Request Training
Include your Children when Baking Cookies
[They may be on to something!]
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
[You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?!]
Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
(He probably IS the battery charge)
New Study of Obesity Looks for LargerTest Group
[Weren't they fat enough?!]
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
[That's what he gets for eating those beans!]
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
[Taste like chicken?]
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
[Chainsaw Massacre all over again!]
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
[Boy, are they tall!]
And the winner is....
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
(Did I read that sign right?)
Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted
Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case
Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents
Farmer Bill Dies in House
Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
Stud Tires Out
Prostitutes Appeal to Pope
Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
Soviet Virgin Lands Short of Goal Again
British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands
Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms
Eye Drops off Shelf
Teacher Strikes Idle Kids
Reagan Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead
Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim
Shot Off Woman's Leg Helps Nicklaus to 66
Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax
Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told
Miners Refuse to Work after Death
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
Stolen Painting Found by Tree
Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies
Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years in Checkout Counter
Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years
Never Withhold Herpes Infection from Loved One
Drunken Drivers Paid $1000 in `84
War Dims Hope for Peace
If Strike isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While
Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge
Deer Kill 17,000
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy
Arson Suspect is Held in Massachusetts Fire
British Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply
Ban On Soliciting Dead in Trotwood
Lansing Residents Can Drop Off Trees
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
New Vaccine May Contain Rabies
Man Minus Ear Waives Hearing
Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing
Air Head Fired
Steals Clock, Faces Time
Prosecutor Releases Probe into Undersheriff
Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumni
Bank Drive-in Window Blocked by Board
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
Some Pieces of Rock Hudson Sold at Auction
Sex Education Delayed, Teachers Request Training
Include your Children when Baking Cookies
[They may be on to something!]
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
[You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?!]
Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
(He probably IS the battery charge)
New Study of Obesity Looks for LargerTest Group
[Weren't they fat enough?!]
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
[That's what he gets for eating those beans!]
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
[Taste like chicken?]
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
[Chainsaw Massacre all over again!]
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
[Boy, are they tall!]
And the winner is....
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
(Did I read that sign right?)
Monday, January 30, 2006
The World at Night
NASA's composite picture of the world at 9pm. It was their Astronomy Picture of the Day on 27 Nov 2000.
Click on the picture to enlarge.
Click on the picture to enlarge.
Friday, January 27, 2006
What's your tree?
Find your birthday and then find your tree. This is really cool and somewhat accurate, also in line with Celtic astrology.
Dec 23 to Jan 01 -& Jun 25 to Jul 04 - Apple Tree
Jan 01 to Jan 11 & Jul 05 to Jul 14 - Fir Tree
Jan 12 to Jan 24 & Jul 15 to Jul 25 -Elm Tree
Jan 25 to Feb 03 & Jul 26 to Aug 04 - Cypress Tree
Feb 04 to Feb 08 & May 01 to May 14 & Aug 05 to Aug 13 - Poplar Tree
Feb 09 to Feb 18 & Aug 14 to Aug 23 - Cedar Tree
Feb 19 to Feb 28 & Aug 24 to Sep 02 - Pine Tree
Mar 01 to Mar 10 & Sep 03 to Sep 12 - Weeping Willow Tree
Mar 11 to Mar 20 & Sep 13 to Sep 22 - Lime Tree
Mar 21 (only) -Oak Tree
Mar 22 to Mar 31 & Sep 24 to Oct 03 - Hazelnut Tree
Apr 01 to Apr 10 & Oct 04 to Oct 13 - Rowan Tree
Apr 11 to Apr 20 & Oct 14 to Oct 23 - Maple Tree
Apr 21 to Apr 30 & Oct 24 to Nov 11 - Walnut Tree
May 15 to May 24 & Nov 12 to Nov 21 - Chestnut Tree
May 25 to Jun 03 & Nov 22 to Dec 01 - Ash Tree
Jun 04 to Jun 13 & Dec 02 to Dec 11 - Hornbeam Tree
Jun 14 to Jun 23 & Dec 12 to Dec 21 - Fig Tree
Jun 24 (only) - Birch Tree
Sep 23 (only) - Olive Tree
Dec 22 (only) - Beech Tree
YOUR TREE (in alphabetical order)
Apple Tree (Love) -- quiet and shy at times, lots of charm, appeal, and attraction, pleasant attitude, flirtatious smile, adventurous, sensitive, loyal in love, wants to love and be loved, faithful and tender partner,very generous, many talents, loves children, needs affectionate partner.
Ash Tree (Ambition) -- extremely attractive, vivacious, impulsive, demanding, does not care for criticism, ambitious, intelligent, talented, likes to play with fate, can be very egotistic, reliable, restless lover, sometimes money rules over the heart, demands attention, needs love and much emotional support.
Beech Tree (Creative) -- has good taste, concerned about its looks, materialistic, good organization of life and career, economical, good leader, takes no unnecessary risks, reasonable, splendid lifetime companion, keen on keeping fit (diets, sports, etc.).
Birch Tree (Inspiration) -- vivacious, attractive, elegant, friendly, unpretentious, modest, does not like anything in excess, abhors the vulgar, loves life in nature and in calm, not very passionate, full of imagination, little ambition, creates a calm and content atmosphere.
Cedar Tree (Confidence) -- of rare strength, knows how to adapt, likes unexpected presents, of good health, not in the least shy, tends to look down on others, self-confident, a great speaker, determined, often impatient, likes to impress others, has many talents, industrious, healthy optimism, waits for the one true love, able to make quick decisions.
Chestnut Tree (Honesty) -- of unusual stature, impressive, well-developed sense of justice, fun to be around, a planner, born diplomat, can be irritated easily, sensitive of others feelings, hard worker, sometimes acts superior, feels not understood at times, fiercely family oriented, very loyal in love, physically fit.
Cypress Tree (Faithfulness) -- strong, muscular, adaptable, takes what life has to give but doesn't necessarily like it, strives to be content, optimistic, wants to be financially independent, wants love and affection, hates loneliness, passionate lover which cannot be satisfied, faithful, quick-tempered at times, can be unruly and careless, loves to gain knowledge, needs to be needed.
Elm Tree (Noble-mindedness) -- pleasant shape, tasteful clothes, modest demands, tends not to forgive mistakes, cheerful, likes to lead but not to obey, honest and faithful partner, likes making decisions for others, noble-minded, generous, good sense of humour, practical.
Fig Tree (Sensibility) -- very strong minded, a bit self-willed, honest, loyal, independent, hates contradiction or arguments, hard worker when wants to be, ! loves life and friends, enjoys children and animals, few sexual relationships, great sense of humour, has artistic talent and great intelligence.
Fir tree (Mysterious) -- extraordinary taste, handles stress well, loves anything beautiful, stubborn, tends to care for those close to them, hard to trust others, yet a social butterfly, likes idleness and laziness after long demanding hours at work, rather modest, talented, unselfish, many friends, very reliable.
Hazelnut Tree (Extraordinary) -- charming, sense of humour, very demanding but can also be very understanding, knows how to make a lasting impression, active fighter for social causes and politics popular, quite moody, sexually oriented, honest, a perfectionist, has a precise sense of judgment and expects complete fairness.
Hornbeam Tree (Good Taste) -- of cool beauty, cares for its looks and condition, good taste, is not egoistic, makes life as comfortable as possible, leads a reasonable and disciplined life, looks for kindness and acknowledgment in an emotional partner, dreams of unusual lovers, is seldom happy with its feelings, mistrusts most people, is never sure of its decisions, very conscientious.
Lime Tree (Doubt) - intelligent, hard working, accepts what life dishes out, but not before trying to change bad circumstances into good ones, hates fighting and stress, enjoys getaway vacations, may appear tough, but is actually soft and relenting, always willing to make sacrifices for family and friends, has many talents but not always enough time to use them, can become a complainer, great leadership qualities, is jealous at times but extremely loyal.
Maple Tree (Independence of Mind) -- no ordinary person, full of imagination and originality, shy and reserved, ambitious, proud, self-confident, hungers for new experiences, sometimes nervous, has many complexities, good memory, learns easily, complicated love life, wants to impress.
Oak Tree (Brave) -- robust nature, courageous, strong, unrelenting, independent, sensible, does not like change, keeps its feet on the ground, person of action.
Olive Tree (Wisdom) -- loves sun, warmth and kind feelings, reasonable, balanced, avoids aggression and violence, tolerant, cheerful, calm, well-developed sense of justice, sensitive, empathetic, free of jealousy, loves to read and the company of sophisticated people.
Pine Tree (Peacemaker) -- loves agreeable company, craves peace and harmony, loves to help others, active imagination, likes to write poetry, not fashion conscious, great compassion, friendly to all, falls strongly in love but will leave if betrayed or lied to, emotionally soft, low self esteem, needs affection and reassurance.
Poplar Tree (Uncertainty) -- looks very decorative, talented, not very self-confident, extremely courageous if necessary, needs goodwill and pleasant surroundings, very choosy, often lonely, great animosity, great artistic nature, good organizer, tends to lean toward philosophy, reliable in any situation, takes partnership seriously.
Rowan Tree (Sensitivity) -- full of charm, cheerful, gifted without egoism, likes to draw attention, loves life, motion, unrest, and even complications, is both dependent and independent, good taste, artistic, passionate, emotional, good company, does not forgive.
Walnut Tree (Passion) -- unrelenting, strange and full of contrasts, often egotistic, aggressive, noble, broad horizon, unexpected reactions, spontaneous, unlimited ambition, no flexibility, difficult and uncommon partner, not always liked but often admired, ingenious strategist, very jealous and passionate, no compromise.
Weeping Willow (Melancholy) - likes to be stress free, loves family life, full of hopes and dreams, attractive, very empathetic, loves anything beautiful, musically inclined, loves to travel to exotic places, restless, capricious, honest, can be influenced but is not easy to live with when pressured, sometimes demanding, good intuition, suffers in love until they find that one loyal, steadfast partner; loves to make others laugh
Dec 23 to Jan 01 -& Jun 25 to Jul 04 - Apple Tree
Jan 01 to Jan 11 & Jul 05 to Jul 14 - Fir Tree
Jan 12 to Jan 24 & Jul 15 to Jul 25 -Elm Tree
Jan 25 to Feb 03 & Jul 26 to Aug 04 - Cypress Tree
Feb 04 to Feb 08 & May 01 to May 14 & Aug 05 to Aug 13 - Poplar Tree
Feb 09 to Feb 18 & Aug 14 to Aug 23 - Cedar Tree
Feb 19 to Feb 28 & Aug 24 to Sep 02 - Pine Tree
Mar 01 to Mar 10 & Sep 03 to Sep 12 - Weeping Willow Tree
Mar 11 to Mar 20 & Sep 13 to Sep 22 - Lime Tree
Mar 21 (only) -Oak Tree
Mar 22 to Mar 31 & Sep 24 to Oct 03 - Hazelnut Tree
Apr 01 to Apr 10 & Oct 04 to Oct 13 - Rowan Tree
Apr 11 to Apr 20 & Oct 14 to Oct 23 - Maple Tree
Apr 21 to Apr 30 & Oct 24 to Nov 11 - Walnut Tree
May 15 to May 24 & Nov 12 to Nov 21 - Chestnut Tree
May 25 to Jun 03 & Nov 22 to Dec 01 - Ash Tree
Jun 04 to Jun 13 & Dec 02 to Dec 11 - Hornbeam Tree
Jun 14 to Jun 23 & Dec 12 to Dec 21 - Fig Tree
Jun 24 (only) - Birch Tree
Sep 23 (only) - Olive Tree
Dec 22 (only) - Beech Tree
YOUR TREE (in alphabetical order)
Apple Tree (Love) -- quiet and shy at times, lots of charm, appeal, and attraction, pleasant attitude, flirtatious smile, adventurous, sensitive, loyal in love, wants to love and be loved, faithful and tender partner,very generous, many talents, loves children, needs affectionate partner.
Ash Tree (Ambition) -- extremely attractive, vivacious, impulsive, demanding, does not care for criticism, ambitious, intelligent, talented, likes to play with fate, can be very egotistic, reliable, restless lover, sometimes money rules over the heart, demands attention, needs love and much emotional support.
Beech Tree (Creative) -- has good taste, concerned about its looks, materialistic, good organization of life and career, economical, good leader, takes no unnecessary risks, reasonable, splendid lifetime companion, keen on keeping fit (diets, sports, etc.).
Birch Tree (Inspiration) -- vivacious, attractive, elegant, friendly, unpretentious, modest, does not like anything in excess, abhors the vulgar, loves life in nature and in calm, not very passionate, full of imagination, little ambition, creates a calm and content atmosphere.
Cedar Tree (Confidence) -- of rare strength, knows how to adapt, likes unexpected presents, of good health, not in the least shy, tends to look down on others, self-confident, a great speaker, determined, often impatient, likes to impress others, has many talents, industrious, healthy optimism, waits for the one true love, able to make quick decisions.
Chestnut Tree (Honesty) -- of unusual stature, impressive, well-developed sense of justice, fun to be around, a planner, born diplomat, can be irritated easily, sensitive of others feelings, hard worker, sometimes acts superior, feels not understood at times, fiercely family oriented, very loyal in love, physically fit.
Cypress Tree (Faithfulness) -- strong, muscular, adaptable, takes what life has to give but doesn't necessarily like it, strives to be content, optimistic, wants to be financially independent, wants love and affection, hates loneliness, passionate lover which cannot be satisfied, faithful, quick-tempered at times, can be unruly and careless, loves to gain knowledge, needs to be needed.
Elm Tree (Noble-mindedness) -- pleasant shape, tasteful clothes, modest demands, tends not to forgive mistakes, cheerful, likes to lead but not to obey, honest and faithful partner, likes making decisions for others, noble-minded, generous, good sense of humour, practical.
Fig Tree (Sensibility) -- very strong minded, a bit self-willed, honest, loyal, independent, hates contradiction or arguments, hard worker when wants to be, ! loves life and friends, enjoys children and animals, few sexual relationships, great sense of humour, has artistic talent and great intelligence.
Fir tree (Mysterious) -- extraordinary taste, handles stress well, loves anything beautiful, stubborn, tends to care for those close to them, hard to trust others, yet a social butterfly, likes idleness and laziness after long demanding hours at work, rather modest, talented, unselfish, many friends, very reliable.
Hazelnut Tree (Extraordinary) -- charming, sense of humour, very demanding but can also be very understanding, knows how to make a lasting impression, active fighter for social causes and politics popular, quite moody, sexually oriented, honest, a perfectionist, has a precise sense of judgment and expects complete fairness.
Hornbeam Tree (Good Taste) -- of cool beauty, cares for its looks and condition, good taste, is not egoistic, makes life as comfortable as possible, leads a reasonable and disciplined life, looks for kindness and acknowledgment in an emotional partner, dreams of unusual lovers, is seldom happy with its feelings, mistrusts most people, is never sure of its decisions, very conscientious.
Lime Tree (Doubt) - intelligent, hard working, accepts what life dishes out, but not before trying to change bad circumstances into good ones, hates fighting and stress, enjoys getaway vacations, may appear tough, but is actually soft and relenting, always willing to make sacrifices for family and friends, has many talents but not always enough time to use them, can become a complainer, great leadership qualities, is jealous at times but extremely loyal.
Maple Tree (Independence of Mind) -- no ordinary person, full of imagination and originality, shy and reserved, ambitious, proud, self-confident, hungers for new experiences, sometimes nervous, has many complexities, good memory, learns easily, complicated love life, wants to impress.
Oak Tree (Brave) -- robust nature, courageous, strong, unrelenting, independent, sensible, does not like change, keeps its feet on the ground, person of action.
Olive Tree (Wisdom) -- loves sun, warmth and kind feelings, reasonable, balanced, avoids aggression and violence, tolerant, cheerful, calm, well-developed sense of justice, sensitive, empathetic, free of jealousy, loves to read and the company of sophisticated people.
Pine Tree (Peacemaker) -- loves agreeable company, craves peace and harmony, loves to help others, active imagination, likes to write poetry, not fashion conscious, great compassion, friendly to all, falls strongly in love but will leave if betrayed or lied to, emotionally soft, low self esteem, needs affection and reassurance.
Poplar Tree (Uncertainty) -- looks very decorative, talented, not very self-confident, extremely courageous if necessary, needs goodwill and pleasant surroundings, very choosy, often lonely, great animosity, great artistic nature, good organizer, tends to lean toward philosophy, reliable in any situation, takes partnership seriously.
Rowan Tree (Sensitivity) -- full of charm, cheerful, gifted without egoism, likes to draw attention, loves life, motion, unrest, and even complications, is both dependent and independent, good taste, artistic, passionate, emotional, good company, does not forgive.
Walnut Tree (Passion) -- unrelenting, strange and full of contrasts, often egotistic, aggressive, noble, broad horizon, unexpected reactions, spontaneous, unlimited ambition, no flexibility, difficult and uncommon partner, not always liked but often admired, ingenious strategist, very jealous and passionate, no compromise.
Weeping Willow (Melancholy) - likes to be stress free, loves family life, full of hopes and dreams, attractive, very empathetic, loves anything beautiful, musically inclined, loves to travel to exotic places, restless, capricious, honest, can be influenced but is not easy to live with when pressured, sometimes demanding, good intuition, suffers in love until they find that one loyal, steadfast partner; loves to make others laugh
American Customs
An Indian migrated to America, and moved into an American neighbourhood; his American neighbour went next door to wish him welcome. He was shocked to see the man from India in his nice backyard chasing ten chickens around like mad. "Must be an Indian custom," he thought to himself. Deciding he could p ut off the welcome till a later date, he went home.
The next day, he decided he was going to welcome the Indian man again. When he looked through his window, he saw the Indian man urinate into a cup and drink it. "Must be an Indian custom," he thought to himself. Deciding he could put off the welcome till the next day, he went on with other stuff.
The third day, he was determined to welcome the Indian man. At his gate, he saw the Indian man with his ear pressed against a cow's big fat butt. Seeing this, he became disgusted and went up to the Indian man. "I'm sorry sir, I did want to wish you a warm welcome, but I cannot stand your crazy Indian customs!" He yelled in the Indian man's face.
The Indian man looked confused and answered. "Sorry sir, I think you are mistaken. These are actually American customs. I was told, that in order to be a true American, you have to chase chicks, get piss drunk, and listen to bullshit."
The next day, he decided he was going to welcome the Indian man again. When he looked through his window, he saw the Indian man urinate into a cup and drink it. "Must be an Indian custom," he thought to himself. Deciding he could put off the welcome till the next day, he went on with other stuff.
The third day, he was determined to welcome the Indian man. At his gate, he saw the Indian man with his ear pressed against a cow's big fat butt. Seeing this, he became disgusted and went up to the Indian man. "I'm sorry sir, I did want to wish you a warm welcome, but I cannot stand your crazy Indian customs!" He yelled in the Indian man's face.
The Indian man looked confused and answered. "Sorry sir, I think you are mistaken. These are actually American customs. I was told, that in order to be a true American, you have to chase chicks, get piss drunk, and listen to bullshit."
VIDEO: I Am India
3 mts 36 secs
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
For your viewing pleasure on the Republic Day: I Am India
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
For your viewing pleasure on the Republic Day: I Am India
Friday, January 20, 2006
VIDEO: Charlie Rose interviews Pakistan PM Shaukat Aziz
56 mts 40 secs
Please click the Play button above.
This is one interesting interview. Shaukat Aziz certainly is younger and suaver than Indian PM Manmohan Singh. In this interview, which takes places right after the missile strike in Pakistan, Aziz presents an interesting picture. On occasion he comes across as direct and honest; he is clearly evasive the rest of the time. Check out for yourself.
Please click the Play button above.
This is one interesting interview. Shaukat Aziz certainly is younger and suaver than Indian PM Manmohan Singh. In this interview, which takes places right after the missile strike in Pakistan, Aziz presents an interesting picture. On occasion he comes across as direct and honest; he is clearly evasive the rest of the time. Check out for yourself.
Thursday, January 19, 2006
VIDEO: Pepsi Will Rock You
2 mts 59 secs
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
Saturday, January 14, 2006
Party Q&A
Q - Why does a man's penis have a hole in it?
A - So he can get oxygen to his brain.
---------------------------------------------
Q - What did the tsunami say to the coconut tree?
A - You better hold on to your nuts baby, this is nor ordinary blow job.
---------------------------------------------
Q - Mothers have Mother's Day and fathers have Father's Day but what day is dedicated to single guys?
A - Palm Sunday.
---------------------------------------------
Q - What is the difference between a blonde woman and an ironing board?
A - Sometimes the legs of an ironing board are hard to open.
---------------------------------------------
Q - What do you get when you mix holy water with prune juice?
A - A religious movement.
---------------------------------------------
Q - How do you spot a blind man in a nudist colony?
A - It isn't hard.
---------------------------------------------
Q - What is the punishment for bigamy?
A - Two mothers-in-law.
---------------------------------------------
Q - Why did the hard-of-hearing chief of police order the SWAT team to surround the department store?
A - He heard they had Summer Bed Linen inside.
---------------------------------------------
Q - What is the difference between in-laws and outlaws?
A - Outlaws are wanted.
A - So he can get oxygen to his brain.
---------------------------------------------
Q - What did the tsunami say to the coconut tree?
A - You better hold on to your nuts baby, this is nor ordinary blow job.
---------------------------------------------
Q - Mothers have Mother's Day and fathers have Father's Day but what day is dedicated to single guys?
A - Palm Sunday.
---------------------------------------------
Q - What is the difference between a blonde woman and an ironing board?
A - Sometimes the legs of an ironing board are hard to open.
---------------------------------------------
Q - What do you get when you mix holy water with prune juice?
A - A religious movement.
---------------------------------------------
Q - How do you spot a blind man in a nudist colony?
A - It isn't hard.
---------------------------------------------
Q - What is the punishment for bigamy?
A - Two mothers-in-law.
---------------------------------------------
Q - Why did the hard-of-hearing chief of police order the SWAT team to surround the department store?
A - He heard they had Summer Bed Linen inside.
---------------------------------------------
Q - What is the difference between in-laws and outlaws?
A - Outlaws are wanted.
Thursday, January 12, 2006
Optical Illusions: Camels in Turkey
Click on the picture to enlarge
The black ones are shadows, while the small white ones are the real camels....it is a shot from the top.
UPDATE: Received again Mar 29, 2006
UPDATE: Received again Aug 09, 2007
Friday, January 06, 2006
Wednesday, January 04, 2006
You don't know the meaning of stinking rich till you have seen this
Silver Audi A8 car made for a Sheikh in Dubai. No, no, it's not a silver-colored car - it is made of silver!
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
Monday, January 02, 2006
VIDEO: Russell Peters as BBC's tsunami correspondent
3 mts 53 secs
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
Russel Peters as BBC's correspondent in tsunami-hit Thailand.
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
Russel Peters as BBC's correspondent in tsunami-hit Thailand.
Only in America: Life in the Times of George W Bush (2005)
"[I]t's a myth to think I don't know what's going on. It's a myth to think that I'm not aware that there's opinions that don't agree with mine, because I'm fully aware of that."
Philadelphia, Pa., Dec. 12, 2005
"I mean, there was a serious international effort to say to Saddam Hussein, you're a threat. And the 9/11 attacks extenuated that threat, as far as I-concerned."
Philadelphia, Dec. 12, 2005
"I think we are welcomed. But it was not a peaceful welcome."
defending Vice President Dick Cheney's pre-war assertion that the United States would be welcomed in Iraq as liberators, NBC Nightly News interview, Dec. 12, 2005
"Those who enter the country illegally violate the law."
Tucson, Ariz., Nov. 28, 2005
"As a matter of fact, I know relations between our governments is good."
on U.S.-South Korean relations, Washington D.C., Nov. 8, 2005
"Wow! Brazil is big."
after being shown a map of Brazil by Brazilian president Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva, Brasilia, Brazil, Nov. 6, 2005
"Bin Laden says his own role is to tell Muslims, quote, 'what is good for them and what is not.'"
Washington D.C., Oct. 6, 2005
"I think it's important to bring somebody from outside the system, the judicial system, somebody that hasn't been on the bench and, therefore, there's not a lot of opinions for people to look at."
on the nomination of Harriet Miers to the Supreme Court, Washington, D.C., October 4, 2005
"We look forward to hearing your vision, so we can more better do our job. That's what I'm telling you."
Gulfport, Miss., Sept. 20, 2005
"If it were to rain a lot, there is concern from the Army Corps of Engineers that the levees might break. And so, therefore, we're cautious about encouraging people to return at this moment of history."
Washington, D.C., Sept. 19, 2005
"Listen, I want to thank leaders of the — in the faith — faith-based and community-based community for being here."
Washington, D.C., Sept. 6, 2005
"I can't wait to join you in the joy of welcoming neighbors back into neighborhoods, and small businesses up and running, and cutting those ribbons that somebody is creating new jobs."
Poplarville, Miss., Sept. 5, 2005
"Brownie, you're doing a heck of a job."
to FEMA director Michael Brown, who resigned 10 days later amid criticism over his job performance, Mobile, Ala., Sept. 2, 2005
"We've got a lot of rebuilding to do. First, we're going to save lives and stabilize the situation. And then we're going to help these communities rebuild. The good news is -- and it's hard for some to see it now -- that out of this chaos is going to come a fantastic Gulf Coast, like it was before. Out of the rubbles of Trent Lott's house -- he's lost his entire house -- there's going to be a fantastic house. And I'm looking forward to sitting on the porch."
touring hurricane damage, Mobile, Ala., Sept. 2, 2005
"My thoughts are, we're going to get somebody who knows what they're talking about when it comes to rebuilding cities."
on rebuilding New Orleans, Biloxi, Miss., Sept. 2, 2005
"It's totally wiped out. ... It's devastating, it's got to be doubly devastating on the ground."
turning to his aides while surveying Hurricane Katrina flood damage from Air Force One , Aug. 31, 2005
"The best place for the facts to be done is by somebody who's spending time investigating it."
on the probe into how CIA agent Valerie Plame's identity was leaked, Washington D.C., July 18, 2005
"I'm looking forward to a good night's sleep on the soil of a friend."
on visiting Denmark, Washington D.C., June 29, 2005
"I was going to say he's a piece of work, but that might not translate too well. Is that all right, if I call you a 'piece of work'?"
to Jean-Claude Juncker, prime minister of Luxembourg, Washington, D.C., June 20, 2005
"The relations with, uhh — Europe are important relations, and they've, uhh — because, we do share values. And, they're universal values, they're not American values or, you know — European values, they're universal values. And those values — uhh — being universal, ought to be applied everywhere."
at a press conference with European Union dignitaries, Washington, D.C., June 20, 2005
"You see, not only did the attacks help accelerate a recession, the attacks reminded us that we are at war."
on the Sept. 11 attacks, Washington, D.C., June 8, 2005
"And the second way to defeat the terrorists is to spread freedom. You see, the best way to defeat a society that is — doesn't have hope, a society where people become so angry they're willing to become suiciders, is to spread freedom, is to spread democracy."
Washington, D.C., June 8, 2005
"It seemed like to me they based some of their decisions on the word of — and the allegations — by people who were held in detention, people who hate America, people that had been trained in some instances to disassemble — that means not tell the truth."
on an Amnesty International report on prisoner abuse at Guantanamo Bay, Washington, D.C., May 31, 2005
"See, in my line of work you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of catapult the propaganda."
Greece, N.Y., May 24, 2005
"We discussed the way forward in Iraq, discussed the importance of a democracy in the greater Middle East in order to leave behind a peaceful tomorrow."
Tbilisi, Georgia, May 10, 2005
"I think younger workers — first of all, younger workers have been promised benefits the government — promises that have been promised, benefits that we can't keep. That's just the way it is."
Washington, D.C., May 4, 2005
"It means your own money would grow better than that which the government can make it grow. And that's important."
on what private accounts could do for Social Security funds, Falls Church, Va., April 29, 2005
"I can only speak to myself."
Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005
"It's in our country's interests to find those who would do harm to us and get them out of harm's way."
Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005
"We expect the states to show us whether or not we're achieving simple objectives — like literacy, literacy in math, the ability to read and write."
on federal education requirements, Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005
"He understands the need for a timely write of the constitution."
on Prime Minister Iyad Allawi of Iraq, Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005
"But Iraq has — have got people there that are willing to kill, and they're hard-nosed killers. And we will work with the Iraqis to secure their future."
Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005
"I appreciate my love for Laura."
Washington, D.C., April 20, 2005
"We have enough coal to last for 250 years, yet coal also prevents an environmental challenge."
Washington, D.C., April 20, 2005
"Part of the facts is understanding we have a problem, and part of the facts is what you're going to do about it."
Kirtland, Ohio, April 15, 2005
"I'm going to spend a lot of time on Social Security. I enjoy it. I enjoy taking on the issue. I guess, it's the Mother in me."
Washington D.C., April 14, 2005
"We look forward to analyzing and working with legislation that will make — it would hope — put a free press's mind at ease that you're not being denied information you shouldn't see."
Washington, D.C., April 14, 2005
"I want to thank you for the importance that you've shown for education and literacy."
Washington, D.C., April 13, 2005
"I understand there's a suspicion that we—we're too security-conscience."
Washington D.C., April 14, 2005
"If they pre-decease or die early, there's an asset base to be able to pass on to a loved one."
on Social Security money held in private accounts, Cedar Rapids, Iowa, March 30, 2005
[I'm] occasionally reading, I want you to know, in the second term."
Washington, D.C., March 16, 2005
"In this job you've got a lot on your plate on a regular basis; you don't have much time to sit around and wander, lonely, in the Oval Office, kind of asking different portraits, 'How do you think my standing will be?'"
Washington, D.C., March 16, 2005
"In terms of timetables, as quickly as possible — whatever that means."
on his time frame for shoring up Social Security, Washington D.C., March 16, 2005
"I like the idea of people running for office. There's a positive effect when you run for office. Maybe some will run for office and say, vote for me, I look forward to blowing up America. I don't know, I don't know if that will be their platform or not. But it's -- I don't think so. I think people who generally run for office say, vote for me, I'm looking forward to fixing your potholes, or making sure you got bread on the table."
on elections in the Middle East, Washington, D.C., March 16, 2005
"I repeat, personal accounts do not permanently fix the solution."
Washington, D.C., March 16, 2005
"This notion that the United States is getting ready to attack Iran is simply ridiculous. And having said that, all options are on the table."
Brussels, Belgium, Feb. 22, 2005
"If you're a younger person, you ought to be asking members of Congress and the United States Senate and the president what you intend to do about it. If you see a train wreck coming, you ought to be saying, what are you going to do about it, Mr. Congressman, or Madam Congressman?"
Detroit, Mich., Feb. 8, 2005
"Because the — all which is on the table begins to address the big cost drivers. For example, how benefits are calculate, for example, is on the table; whether or not benefits rise based upon wage increases or price increases. There's a series of parts of the formula that are being considered. And when you couple that, those different cost drivers, affecting those — changing those with personal accounts, the idea is to get what has been promised more likely to be — or closer delivered to what has been promised. Does that make any sense to you? It's kind of muddled. Look, there's a series of things that cause the — like, for example, benefits are calculated based upon the increase of wages, as opposed to the increase of prices. Some have suggested that we calculate — the benefits will rise based upon inflation, as opposed to wage increases. There is a reform that would help solve the red if that were put into effect. In other words, how fast benefits grow, how fast the promised benefits grow, if those — if that growth is affected, it will help on the red."
explaining his plan to save Social Security, Tampa, Fla., Feb. 4, 2005
"You work three jobs? … Uniquely American, isn't it? I mean, that is fantastic that you're doing that."
to a divorced mother of three, Omaha, Nebraska, Feb. 4, 2005
"After all, Europe is America's closest ally."
Mainz, Germany, Feb. 23, 2005
"Because he's hiding."
responding to a reporter who asked why Osama bin Laden had not been caught, aboard Air Force One, Jan. 14, 2005
"I'm also mindful that man should never try to put words in God's mouth. I mean, we should never ascribe natural disasters or anything else to God. We are in no way, shape, or form should a human being, play God."
ABC's 20/20, Washington D.C., Jan. 14, 2005
"I want to appreciate those of you who wear our nation's uniform for your sacrifice."
Jacksonville, Fla., Jan. 14, 2005
"I speak plainly sometimes, but you've got to be mindful of the consequences of the words. So put that down. I don't know if you'd call that a confession, a regret, something."
speaking to reporters, Washington, D.C., Jan. 14, 2005
"Who could have possibly envisioned an erection — an election in Iraq at this point in history?"
at the white House, Washington, D.C., Jan. 10, 2005
"We need to apply 21st-century information technology to the health care field. We need to have our medical records put on the I.T."
Collinsville, Ill., Jan. 5, 2005
"I believe we are called to do the hard work to make our communities and quality of life a better place."
Collinsville, Ill., Jan. 5, 2005
Philadelphia, Pa., Dec. 12, 2005
"I mean, there was a serious international effort to say to Saddam Hussein, you're a threat. And the 9/11 attacks extenuated that threat, as far as I-concerned."
Philadelphia, Dec. 12, 2005
"I think we are welcomed. But it was not a peaceful welcome."
defending Vice President Dick Cheney's pre-war assertion that the United States would be welcomed in Iraq as liberators, NBC Nightly News interview, Dec. 12, 2005
"Those who enter the country illegally violate the law."
Tucson, Ariz., Nov. 28, 2005
"As a matter of fact, I know relations between our governments is good."
on U.S.-South Korean relations, Washington D.C., Nov. 8, 2005
"Wow! Brazil is big."
after being shown a map of Brazil by Brazilian president Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva, Brasilia, Brazil, Nov. 6, 2005
"Bin Laden says his own role is to tell Muslims, quote, 'what is good for them and what is not.'"
Washington D.C., Oct. 6, 2005
"I think it's important to bring somebody from outside the system, the judicial system, somebody that hasn't been on the bench and, therefore, there's not a lot of opinions for people to look at."
on the nomination of Harriet Miers to the Supreme Court, Washington, D.C., October 4, 2005
"We look forward to hearing your vision, so we can more better do our job. That's what I'm telling you."
Gulfport, Miss., Sept. 20, 2005
"If it were to rain a lot, there is concern from the Army Corps of Engineers that the levees might break. And so, therefore, we're cautious about encouraging people to return at this moment of history."
Washington, D.C., Sept. 19, 2005
"Listen, I want to thank leaders of the — in the faith — faith-based and community-based community for being here."
Washington, D.C., Sept. 6, 2005
"I can't wait to join you in the joy of welcoming neighbors back into neighborhoods, and small businesses up and running, and cutting those ribbons that somebody is creating new jobs."
Poplarville, Miss., Sept. 5, 2005
"Brownie, you're doing a heck of a job."
to FEMA director Michael Brown, who resigned 10 days later amid criticism over his job performance, Mobile, Ala., Sept. 2, 2005
"We've got a lot of rebuilding to do. First, we're going to save lives and stabilize the situation. And then we're going to help these communities rebuild. The good news is -- and it's hard for some to see it now -- that out of this chaos is going to come a fantastic Gulf Coast, like it was before. Out of the rubbles of Trent Lott's house -- he's lost his entire house -- there's going to be a fantastic house. And I'm looking forward to sitting on the porch."
touring hurricane damage, Mobile, Ala., Sept. 2, 2005
"My thoughts are, we're going to get somebody who knows what they're talking about when it comes to rebuilding cities."
on rebuilding New Orleans, Biloxi, Miss., Sept. 2, 2005
"It's totally wiped out. ... It's devastating, it's got to be doubly devastating on the ground."
turning to his aides while surveying Hurricane Katrina flood damage from Air Force One , Aug. 31, 2005
"The best place for the facts to be done is by somebody who's spending time investigating it."
on the probe into how CIA agent Valerie Plame's identity was leaked, Washington D.C., July 18, 2005
"I'm looking forward to a good night's sleep on the soil of a friend."
on visiting Denmark, Washington D.C., June 29, 2005
"I was going to say he's a piece of work, but that might not translate too well. Is that all right, if I call you a 'piece of work'?"
to Jean-Claude Juncker, prime minister of Luxembourg, Washington, D.C., June 20, 2005
"The relations with, uhh — Europe are important relations, and they've, uhh — because, we do share values. And, they're universal values, they're not American values or, you know — European values, they're universal values. And those values — uhh — being universal, ought to be applied everywhere."
at a press conference with European Union dignitaries, Washington, D.C., June 20, 2005
"You see, not only did the attacks help accelerate a recession, the attacks reminded us that we are at war."
on the Sept. 11 attacks, Washington, D.C., June 8, 2005
"And the second way to defeat the terrorists is to spread freedom. You see, the best way to defeat a society that is — doesn't have hope, a society where people become so angry they're willing to become suiciders, is to spread freedom, is to spread democracy."
Washington, D.C., June 8, 2005
"It seemed like to me they based some of their decisions on the word of — and the allegations — by people who were held in detention, people who hate America, people that had been trained in some instances to disassemble — that means not tell the truth."
on an Amnesty International report on prisoner abuse at Guantanamo Bay, Washington, D.C., May 31, 2005
"See, in my line of work you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of catapult the propaganda."
Greece, N.Y., May 24, 2005
"We discussed the way forward in Iraq, discussed the importance of a democracy in the greater Middle East in order to leave behind a peaceful tomorrow."
Tbilisi, Georgia, May 10, 2005
"I think younger workers — first of all, younger workers have been promised benefits the government — promises that have been promised, benefits that we can't keep. That's just the way it is."
Washington, D.C., May 4, 2005
"It means your own money would grow better than that which the government can make it grow. And that's important."
on what private accounts could do for Social Security funds, Falls Church, Va., April 29, 2005
"I can only speak to myself."
Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005
"It's in our country's interests to find those who would do harm to us and get them out of harm's way."
Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005
"We expect the states to show us whether or not we're achieving simple objectives — like literacy, literacy in math, the ability to read and write."
on federal education requirements, Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005
"He understands the need for a timely write of the constitution."
on Prime Minister Iyad Allawi of Iraq, Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005
"But Iraq has — have got people there that are willing to kill, and they're hard-nosed killers. And we will work with the Iraqis to secure their future."
Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005
"I appreciate my love for Laura."
Washington, D.C., April 20, 2005
"We have enough coal to last for 250 years, yet coal also prevents an environmental challenge."
Washington, D.C., April 20, 2005
"Part of the facts is understanding we have a problem, and part of the facts is what you're going to do about it."
Kirtland, Ohio, April 15, 2005
"I'm going to spend a lot of time on Social Security. I enjoy it. I enjoy taking on the issue. I guess, it's the Mother in me."
Washington D.C., April 14, 2005
"We look forward to analyzing and working with legislation that will make — it would hope — put a free press's mind at ease that you're not being denied information you shouldn't see."
Washington, D.C., April 14, 2005
"I want to thank you for the importance that you've shown for education and literacy."
Washington, D.C., April 13, 2005
"I understand there's a suspicion that we—we're too security-conscience."
Washington D.C., April 14, 2005
"If they pre-decease or die early, there's an asset base to be able to pass on to a loved one."
on Social Security money held in private accounts, Cedar Rapids, Iowa, March 30, 2005
[I'm] occasionally reading, I want you to know, in the second term."
Washington, D.C., March 16, 2005
"In this job you've got a lot on your plate on a regular basis; you don't have much time to sit around and wander, lonely, in the Oval Office, kind of asking different portraits, 'How do you think my standing will be?'"
Washington, D.C., March 16, 2005
"In terms of timetables, as quickly as possible — whatever that means."
on his time frame for shoring up Social Security, Washington D.C., March 16, 2005
"I like the idea of people running for office. There's a positive effect when you run for office. Maybe some will run for office and say, vote for me, I look forward to blowing up America. I don't know, I don't know if that will be their platform or not. But it's -- I don't think so. I think people who generally run for office say, vote for me, I'm looking forward to fixing your potholes, or making sure you got bread on the table."
on elections in the Middle East, Washington, D.C., March 16, 2005
"I repeat, personal accounts do not permanently fix the solution."
Washington, D.C., March 16, 2005
"This notion that the United States is getting ready to attack Iran is simply ridiculous. And having said that, all options are on the table."
Brussels, Belgium, Feb. 22, 2005
"If you're a younger person, you ought to be asking members of Congress and the United States Senate and the president what you intend to do about it. If you see a train wreck coming, you ought to be saying, what are you going to do about it, Mr. Congressman, or Madam Congressman?"
Detroit, Mich., Feb. 8, 2005
"Because the — all which is on the table begins to address the big cost drivers. For example, how benefits are calculate, for example, is on the table; whether or not benefits rise based upon wage increases or price increases. There's a series of parts of the formula that are being considered. And when you couple that, those different cost drivers, affecting those — changing those with personal accounts, the idea is to get what has been promised more likely to be — or closer delivered to what has been promised. Does that make any sense to you? It's kind of muddled. Look, there's a series of things that cause the — like, for example, benefits are calculated based upon the increase of wages, as opposed to the increase of prices. Some have suggested that we calculate — the benefits will rise based upon inflation, as opposed to wage increases. There is a reform that would help solve the red if that were put into effect. In other words, how fast benefits grow, how fast the promised benefits grow, if those — if that growth is affected, it will help on the red."
explaining his plan to save Social Security, Tampa, Fla., Feb. 4, 2005
"You work three jobs? … Uniquely American, isn't it? I mean, that is fantastic that you're doing that."
to a divorced mother of three, Omaha, Nebraska, Feb. 4, 2005
"After all, Europe is America's closest ally."
Mainz, Germany, Feb. 23, 2005
"Because he's hiding."
responding to a reporter who asked why Osama bin Laden had not been caught, aboard Air Force One, Jan. 14, 2005
"I'm also mindful that man should never try to put words in God's mouth. I mean, we should never ascribe natural disasters or anything else to God. We are in no way, shape, or form should a human being, play God."
ABC's 20/20, Washington D.C., Jan. 14, 2005
"I want to appreciate those of you who wear our nation's uniform for your sacrifice."
Jacksonville, Fla., Jan. 14, 2005
"I speak plainly sometimes, but you've got to be mindful of the consequences of the words. So put that down. I don't know if you'd call that a confession, a regret, something."
speaking to reporters, Washington, D.C., Jan. 14, 2005
"Who could have possibly envisioned an erection — an election in Iraq at this point in history?"
at the white House, Washington, D.C., Jan. 10, 2005
"We need to apply 21st-century information technology to the health care field. We need to have our medical records put on the I.T."
Collinsville, Ill., Jan. 5, 2005
"I believe we are called to do the hard work to make our communities and quality of life a better place."
Collinsville, Ill., Jan. 5, 2005
Sunday, December 25, 2005
Saturday, December 24, 2005
Some party jokes
A father was passing by his son's fraternity house late one night when he decided to drop in. He knocked on the front door and a young man replied, What do you want?
Does Tommy Norris live here? the father asked.
Yup, the man said. Just leave him on the front porch as usual.
---------------------------------------------
A church janitor was sweeping the altar when a priest said, "I really have to go to the bathroom. Could you sit in the confessional for a few minutes? Just tell whomever comes in to do 10 Hail Marys as penance."
The janitor did as the priest asked and the first confessor was a woman who said, "Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I performed oral sex on a man."
The janitor was shocked. He didn't think that 10 Hail Marys would be nearly enough punishment, so he stuck his head out of the confessional and asked an altar boy who was passing by, "What does the priest give for oral sex?"
The altar boy replied, "A candy bar or a soda."
---------------------------------------------
A man told his doctor that his wife hadn't had sex with him in seven months. The physician told the man to bring his wife to the office for a private talk. When the wife arrived, the doctor asked about her libido. Well, doctor, she replied, the truth is that I take a cab to work every morning, and the cabbie always asks me, "So are you going to pay today or what?" We don't have much money, so I always give him an "or what". That makes me late for work, and my boss asks me, "So are we going to dock your salary or what?" I always give him the "or what." By the time I get home, I don't feel like having sex anymore.
Hmm, the doctor said. I see. So are we going to tell your husband about your problem or what?
---------------------------------------------
A lion woke up one morning feeling rowdy. He cornered a monkey and roared, "Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?"
The trembling monkey said, "You are, mighty lion."
Later, the lion confronted a deer and bellowed, "Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?"
The terrified deer stammered, "You are by far the mightiest animal in the jungle."
The lion swaggered up to an elephant and roared, "Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?"
Annoyed, the elephant picked up the lion with his trunk, slammed him against a tree and stomped on him. As he hobbled away, the lion said, "Man, just because you don't know the answer, you don't have to make such a big deal about it."
---------------------------------------------
A king suspected that his wife was being unfaithful to him, so he taped a tiny razor blade to her vagina. Three days later, he ordered his knights to drop their pants. They all had bandaged penises, except for one. The king said to him, "I always knew you were my most loyal knight."
He replied, "It wath nothing your magethy."
---------------------------------------------
Two dogs were sitting in the waiting room at a vet's office. One dog said to the other, What are you here for?
The dog replied, Well, I live in this house with a six-year-old boy who is constantly pulling on my ears. One day I just had enough and bit the little shit. So his parents are having me put to sleep. What are you here for?
The first dog answered, I live with this 28-year-old lady that has a killer body. She never wears clothes around the house. One day she was bending over cleaning the bathtub and I couldn't resist. I jumped up and did her.
The other dog asked, Is she putting you to sleep for that?
He replied, No, I'm here to get my nails trimmed.
---------------------------------------------
A man and his wife were having sex. 15 minutes passed, then 30 minutes, then 45 minutes. Sweat was pouring off their bodies. The wife finally opened her eyes and said, What's the matter, darling. Can't you think of anyone else either?
---------------------------------------------
A man and his wife were watching a boxing match on TV. After the knockout, the husband said, That sucks. It was over in three minutes.
His wife replied, Now you know how I feel.
---------------------------------------------
Pfizer and Pepsi Cola have decided to jointly market a Viagra - laced beverage. It will be called Mount and Do, and its ad slogan will be, "Pour Yourself a Stiff One."
---------------------------------------------
Son kills butterfly....dad says no butter for 2 weeks
Son kills honeybee....dad says no honey for 2 weeks
Mom kills cockroach....son says "dad will you tell her or should I?"
---------------------------------------------
A man standing in the back of a crowded hotel elevator shouted out, "Ballroom, please."
The woman in front of him turned around and said, "I'm sorry. I didn't realize I was crowding you."
---------------------------------------------
A man took his Rottweiler to the vet and said, My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?
Well, the vet said, let me have a look at him.
The doctor picked the dog up and examined his eyes. Finally, he said, I'm going to have to put him down.
But why? the man said. Just because he's cross-eyed?
No, the vet replied. Because he's really heavy.
---------------------------------------------
A woman suffering from chronic headaches visited a new age doctor. He advised, When you feel a headache coming on, stare at yourself in a mirror and say, "I do not have a headache. I do not have a headache." I guarantee you will be cured of your ailment right away.
The woman left the doctor's office. In the elevator, her head began to throb. She noticed that the elevator had mirrored walls. She looked at herself and repeated the mantra. Her headache immediately disappeared.
Elated, she ran back into the doctor's office. It worked, she said. You're a genius. I must send my husband to see you. We haven't had sex in months.
A few days later, her husband visited the doctor. When he returned home, he headed straight to the bathroom and locked the door. A few minutes later, he emerged and made passionate love to his wife. When they finished, he returned to the bathroom and shut the door. Ten minutes later, he came out and they had sex again. When he locked himself in the bathroom a third time, the curious wife peeked through the keyhole.
Her husband was staring at himself in the mirror, repeating, "That woman is not my wife. That woman is not my wife."
---------------------------------------------
Stressed out by city living, a man quit his job and bought a cabin in the woods. His closest neighbor was four miles away. One night he was finishing dinner when someone knocked on his door. "I'm your neighbor," the man said. "I'm having a party Saturday and thought you'd like to come."
"I'd love to," the man said.
"Gotta warn you though," the neighbor said. "There's gonna be a lot of drinking."
"I can drink with the best of them," the man said.
"More than likely gonna be some fighting too," the neighbor said.
"I'll just stay out of the way," the man said.
"Last time I had a party, there was some screwing too," the neighbor said.
"Now that's not a problem," the man said. "I've been alone for six months. By the way, what should I wear?"
"Whatever you want," the neighbor said. "Just gonna be the two of us."
---------------------------------------------
A woman went to her doctor for a follow-up visit after the doctor had prescribed testosterone (a male hormone) for her. She was a little worried about some of the side effects she was experiencing.
''Doctor, the hormones you've been giving me have really helped, but I'm afraid that you're giving me too much. I've started growing hair in places that I've never grown hair before.''
The doctor reassured her, ''A little hair growth is a perfectly normal side effect of testosterone. Just where has this hair appeared?''
''On my testicles, which is something else I want to talk to you about...,'' replied the lady.
---------------------------------------------
"Doc," says Steve, "I want to be castrated."
"What on earth for?" asks the doctor in amazement.
"It's something I've been thinking about for a long time and I want to have it done" replies Steve.
"But have you thought it through properly?" asks the doctor, "It's a very serious operation and once it's done, there's no going back. It will change your life forever!"
"I'm aware of that and you're not going to change my mind -- either you book me in to be castrated or I'll simply go to another doctor."
"Well, OK.", says the doctor, "But it's against my better judgment!"
So Steve has his operation, and the next day he is up and walking very slowly, legs apart, down the hospital corridor with his drip stand. Heading towards him is another patient, who is walking exactly the
adi: the same way.
"Hi there," says Steve,"It looks as if you've just had the same operation as me."
"Well," said the patient, "I finally decided after 37 years of life that I would like to be circumcised."
Steve stared at him in horror and screamed, "Shit! THAT'S the word!”
---------------------------------------------
Mother Vampire to Daughter Vampire when she sees her taking a used tampon: No young lady, no in-between meal snacks!
---------------------------------------------
A blonde walked up to an airport ticket counter and asked to buy a round trip ticket. The ticket agent asked, Where to?
The blonde rolled her eyes and said, Duuuuuh, back here
---------------------------------------------
I don’t love you. I merely enjoy tolerating your existence immensely.
Does Tommy Norris live here? the father asked.
Yup, the man said. Just leave him on the front porch as usual.
---------------------------------------------
A church janitor was sweeping the altar when a priest said, "I really have to go to the bathroom. Could you sit in the confessional for a few minutes? Just tell whomever comes in to do 10 Hail Marys as penance."
The janitor did as the priest asked and the first confessor was a woman who said, "Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I performed oral sex on a man."
The janitor was shocked. He didn't think that 10 Hail Marys would be nearly enough punishment, so he stuck his head out of the confessional and asked an altar boy who was passing by, "What does the priest give for oral sex?"
The altar boy replied, "A candy bar or a soda."
---------------------------------------------
A man told his doctor that his wife hadn't had sex with him in seven months. The physician told the man to bring his wife to the office for a private talk. When the wife arrived, the doctor asked about her libido. Well, doctor, she replied, the truth is that I take a cab to work every morning, and the cabbie always asks me, "So are you going to pay today or what?" We don't have much money, so I always give him an "or what". That makes me late for work, and my boss asks me, "So are we going to dock your salary or what?" I always give him the "or what." By the time I get home, I don't feel like having sex anymore.
Hmm, the doctor said. I see. So are we going to tell your husband about your problem or what?
---------------------------------------------
A lion woke up one morning feeling rowdy. He cornered a monkey and roared, "Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?"
The trembling monkey said, "You are, mighty lion."
Later, the lion confronted a deer and bellowed, "Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?"
The terrified deer stammered, "You are by far the mightiest animal in the jungle."
The lion swaggered up to an elephant and roared, "Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?"
Annoyed, the elephant picked up the lion with his trunk, slammed him against a tree and stomped on him. As he hobbled away, the lion said, "Man, just because you don't know the answer, you don't have to make such a big deal about it."
---------------------------------------------
A king suspected that his wife was being unfaithful to him, so he taped a tiny razor blade to her vagina. Three days later, he ordered his knights to drop their pants. They all had bandaged penises, except for one. The king said to him, "I always knew you were my most loyal knight."
He replied, "It wath nothing your magethy."
---------------------------------------------
Two dogs were sitting in the waiting room at a vet's office. One dog said to the other, What are you here for?
The dog replied, Well, I live in this house with a six-year-old boy who is constantly pulling on my ears. One day I just had enough and bit the little shit. So his parents are having me put to sleep. What are you here for?
The first dog answered, I live with this 28-year-old lady that has a killer body. She never wears clothes around the house. One day she was bending over cleaning the bathtub and I couldn't resist. I jumped up and did her.
The other dog asked, Is she putting you to sleep for that?
He replied, No, I'm here to get my nails trimmed.
---------------------------------------------
A man and his wife were having sex. 15 minutes passed, then 30 minutes, then 45 minutes. Sweat was pouring off their bodies. The wife finally opened her eyes and said, What's the matter, darling. Can't you think of anyone else either?
---------------------------------------------
A man and his wife were watching a boxing match on TV. After the knockout, the husband said, That sucks. It was over in three minutes.
His wife replied, Now you know how I feel.
---------------------------------------------
Pfizer and Pepsi Cola have decided to jointly market a Viagra - laced beverage. It will be called Mount and Do, and its ad slogan will be, "Pour Yourself a Stiff One."
---------------------------------------------
Son kills butterfly....dad says no butter for 2 weeks
Son kills honeybee....dad says no honey for 2 weeks
Mom kills cockroach....son says "dad will you tell her or should I?"
---------------------------------------------
A man standing in the back of a crowded hotel elevator shouted out, "Ballroom, please."
The woman in front of him turned around and said, "I'm sorry. I didn't realize I was crowding you."
---------------------------------------------
A man took his Rottweiler to the vet and said, My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?
Well, the vet said, let me have a look at him.
The doctor picked the dog up and examined his eyes. Finally, he said, I'm going to have to put him down.
But why? the man said. Just because he's cross-eyed?
No, the vet replied. Because he's really heavy.
---------------------------------------------
A woman suffering from chronic headaches visited a new age doctor. He advised, When you feel a headache coming on, stare at yourself in a mirror and say, "I do not have a headache. I do not have a headache." I guarantee you will be cured of your ailment right away.
The woman left the doctor's office. In the elevator, her head began to throb. She noticed that the elevator had mirrored walls. She looked at herself and repeated the mantra. Her headache immediately disappeared.
Elated, she ran back into the doctor's office. It worked, she said. You're a genius. I must send my husband to see you. We haven't had sex in months.
A few days later, her husband visited the doctor. When he returned home, he headed straight to the bathroom and locked the door. A few minutes later, he emerged and made passionate love to his wife. When they finished, he returned to the bathroom and shut the door. Ten minutes later, he came out and they had sex again. When he locked himself in the bathroom a third time, the curious wife peeked through the keyhole.
Her husband was staring at himself in the mirror, repeating, "That woman is not my wife. That woman is not my wife."
---------------------------------------------
Stressed out by city living, a man quit his job and bought a cabin in the woods. His closest neighbor was four miles away. One night he was finishing dinner when someone knocked on his door. "I'm your neighbor," the man said. "I'm having a party Saturday and thought you'd like to come."
"I'd love to," the man said.
"Gotta warn you though," the neighbor said. "There's gonna be a lot of drinking."
"I can drink with the best of them," the man said.
"More than likely gonna be some fighting too," the neighbor said.
"I'll just stay out of the way," the man said.
"Last time I had a party, there was some screwing too," the neighbor said.
"Now that's not a problem," the man said. "I've been alone for six months. By the way, what should I wear?"
"Whatever you want," the neighbor said. "Just gonna be the two of us."
---------------------------------------------
A woman went to her doctor for a follow-up visit after the doctor had prescribed testosterone (a male hormone) for her. She was a little worried about some of the side effects she was experiencing.
''Doctor, the hormones you've been giving me have really helped, but I'm afraid that you're giving me too much. I've started growing hair in places that I've never grown hair before.''
The doctor reassured her, ''A little hair growth is a perfectly normal side effect of testosterone. Just where has this hair appeared?''
''On my testicles, which is something else I want to talk to you about...,'' replied the lady.
---------------------------------------------
"Doc," says Steve, "I want to be castrated."
"What on earth for?" asks the doctor in amazement.
"It's something I've been thinking about for a long time and I want to have it done" replies Steve.
"But have you thought it through properly?" asks the doctor, "It's a very serious operation and once it's done, there's no going back. It will change your life forever!"
"I'm aware of that and you're not going to change my mind -- either you book me in to be castrated or I'll simply go to another doctor."
"Well, OK.", says the doctor, "But it's against my better judgment!"
So Steve has his operation, and the next day he is up and walking very slowly, legs apart, down the hospital corridor with his drip stand. Heading towards him is another patient, who is walking exactly the
adi: the same way.
"Hi there," says Steve,"It looks as if you've just had the same operation as me."
"Well," said the patient, "I finally decided after 37 years of life that I would like to be circumcised."
Steve stared at him in horror and screamed, "Shit! THAT'S the word!”
---------------------------------------------
Mother Vampire to Daughter Vampire when she sees her taking a used tampon: No young lady, no in-between meal snacks!
---------------------------------------------
A blonde walked up to an airport ticket counter and asked to buy a round trip ticket. The ticket agent asked, Where to?
The blonde rolled her eyes and said, Duuuuuh, back here
---------------------------------------------
I don’t love you. I merely enjoy tolerating your existence immensely.
Monday, December 12, 2005
Beautiful, Peaceful Places
The Mekong River
Fishing boats float in the Mekong River with Luang Prabang, Laos, in the distance.
Ephesus, Turkey
Visitors walk along Curetes Street to explore the ruins of the ancient city of Ephesus, on Turkey's western coast. "In all its classical beauty, Ephesus looks important," says writer James Morgan ("Lost in Time," Traveler October 2004). "You can glance at a cobblestone and imagine it being touched by any of the passing personages there, from King Croesus to Alexander the Great."
Bodrum, Turkey
Writer James Morgan ("Lost in Time," Traveler October 2004) sails in the waters off Bodrum, a bustling port on Turkey's southwestern coast, aboard the 69-foot Kalyeta, a traditional two-masted rig known as a gulet.
Tersane, Turkey
Çaydanliks (Turkish tea pots) line the windowsill of a home on Tersane, the largest island in the Gulf of Fethiye.
Dalyan River, Turkey
A water taxi ferries passengers up the Dalyan River in southwestern Turkey toward funerary rock tombs that resemble the porticoes of small Ionic temples.
Hobart, Tasmania
The vibrant blue-and-black façade of the Tasmanian Symphony Orchestra's rehearsal studios brightens historic downtown Hobart.
Freycinet National Park, Tasmania
Visitors watch the sun rise over Wineglass Bay from a wooden walkway around the base of Cape Tourville Lighthouse.
Cradle Mountain—Lake St. Clair National Park, Tasmania
Heavy fog hangs low over indigenous eucalyptus trees. "Tasmania could be the set for the next J.R.R. Tolkien film, with its mist, rain, rolling hills, bogs, and thick forests," says photographer Kris LeBoutillier.
Ocean Beach, Tasmania
Surfers eat breakfast on Ocean Beach, a pristine 30-mile stretch of sand on Tasmania's western coast. "Their van was amazing," says photographer Kris Leboutillier. "It was kitted out with a folding flat screen television, DVD player, refrigerator, and stereo, all powered by a big marine battery."
Riga, Latvia
A family cuddles on Jurmala Beach, 14 miles outside of Riga, Latvia's capital. "A storm was rolling in, and soon after this photograph was taken, an afternoon-long downpour hit," says photographer Alexandra Avakian. "Weather changes very quickly in Latvia."
Riga, Latvia
His canvas illuminated by an overhead projector, artist Andris Vitolins paints at midnight in the old Soviet-era Artists Union Building.
Riga, Latvia
Designed by Mikhail Einstein, this residential and commercial building on Elizabetes Street is one of the most striking examples of art nouveau (Jugendstil) architecture in Riga's Old Town.
Luang Prabang, Laos
Young girls bike through the intersection of Sisavang Vong and Kitsarath Sethanthirath. The main street of Sisavang Vong is named after the former king of Laos, who ruled for 54 years starting in 1904.
The Mekong River
A child does homework on the banks of the Mekong River, which forms the border between Burma and Thailand, as others play on the boulders that dot the shoreline.
The Mekong River
At sunset, a young boy waters crops on the banks of the Mekong River, which forms the border between Burma and Thailand
Fishing boats float in the Mekong River with Luang Prabang, Laos, in the distance.
Ephesus, Turkey
Visitors walk along Curetes Street to explore the ruins of the ancient city of Ephesus, on Turkey's western coast. "In all its classical beauty, Ephesus looks important," says writer James Morgan ("Lost in Time," Traveler October 2004). "You can glance at a cobblestone and imagine it being touched by any of the passing personages there, from King Croesus to Alexander the Great."
Bodrum, Turkey
Writer James Morgan ("Lost in Time," Traveler October 2004) sails in the waters off Bodrum, a bustling port on Turkey's southwestern coast, aboard the 69-foot Kalyeta, a traditional two-masted rig known as a gulet.
Tersane, Turkey
Çaydanliks (Turkish tea pots) line the windowsill of a home on Tersane, the largest island in the Gulf of Fethiye.
Dalyan River, Turkey
A water taxi ferries passengers up the Dalyan River in southwestern Turkey toward funerary rock tombs that resemble the porticoes of small Ionic temples.
Hobart, Tasmania
The vibrant blue-and-black façade of the Tasmanian Symphony Orchestra's rehearsal studios brightens historic downtown Hobart.
Freycinet National Park, Tasmania
Visitors watch the sun rise over Wineglass Bay from a wooden walkway around the base of Cape Tourville Lighthouse.
Cradle Mountain—Lake St. Clair National Park, Tasmania
Heavy fog hangs low over indigenous eucalyptus trees. "Tasmania could be the set for the next J.R.R. Tolkien film, with its mist, rain, rolling hills, bogs, and thick forests," says photographer Kris LeBoutillier.
Ocean Beach, Tasmania
Surfers eat breakfast on Ocean Beach, a pristine 30-mile stretch of sand on Tasmania's western coast. "Their van was amazing," says photographer Kris Leboutillier. "It was kitted out with a folding flat screen television, DVD player, refrigerator, and stereo, all powered by a big marine battery."
Riga, Latvia
A family cuddles on Jurmala Beach, 14 miles outside of Riga, Latvia's capital. "A storm was rolling in, and soon after this photograph was taken, an afternoon-long downpour hit," says photographer Alexandra Avakian. "Weather changes very quickly in Latvia."
Riga, Latvia
His canvas illuminated by an overhead projector, artist Andris Vitolins paints at midnight in the old Soviet-era Artists Union Building.
Riga, Latvia
Designed by Mikhail Einstein, this residential and commercial building on Elizabetes Street is one of the most striking examples of art nouveau (Jugendstil) architecture in Riga's Old Town.
Luang Prabang, Laos
Young girls bike through the intersection of Sisavang Vong and Kitsarath Sethanthirath. The main street of Sisavang Vong is named after the former king of Laos, who ruled for 54 years starting in 1904.
The Mekong River
A child does homework on the banks of the Mekong River, which forms the border between Burma and Thailand, as others play on the boulders that dot the shoreline.
The Mekong River
At sunset, a young boy waters crops on the banks of the Mekong River, which forms the border between Burma and Thailand
AUDIO: Paul Graham on his book Hackers & Painters
30 mts 49 secs
41 mts 26 secs
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
41 mts 26 secs
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
Friday, December 09, 2005
Meet the Parents
A young man goes into a pharmacy and says to the pharmacist, "Hello, could you give me a condom. I'm going to my girlfriend's home for dinner and I think I may be in with a chance!"
The pharmacist gives him the condom and as the young man is going out, he returns and says, "Give me another condom because my girlfriend's sister is very cute too. She always crosses her legs in a provocative manner when she sees me and I think I might strike it lucky there too".
The pharmacist gives him a second condom and as the boy is leaving, he turns back and says, "Go on, give me one more condom because my girlfriend's mum is still pretty cute and when she sees me she always makes eyes, and since she invited me for dinner, I think she is expecting me to make a move."
During dinner, the young man is sitting with his girlfriend on his left, the sister on his right and the mum facing him. When the dad gets there, the boy lowers his head and starts praying, "Dear Lord, bless this dinner and thank you for all you give us."
A minute later the boy is still praying: "Thank you Lord for your kindness."
Ten minutes gone by and the boy is still praying, keeping his head down.
The others look at each other surprised and his girlfriend is even more surprised than the others. She gets close to the boy and says in his ear, "I didn't know you were so religious."
The boy replies, "I didn't know your dad was a pharmacist!"
The pharmacist gives him the condom and as the young man is going out, he returns and says, "Give me another condom because my girlfriend's sister is very cute too. She always crosses her legs in a provocative manner when she sees me and I think I might strike it lucky there too".
The pharmacist gives him a second condom and as the boy is leaving, he turns back and says, "Go on, give me one more condom because my girlfriend's mum is still pretty cute and when she sees me she always makes eyes, and since she invited me for dinner, I think she is expecting me to make a move."
During dinner, the young man is sitting with his girlfriend on his left, the sister on his right and the mum facing him. When the dad gets there, the boy lowers his head and starts praying, "Dear Lord, bless this dinner and thank you for all you give us."
A minute later the boy is still praying: "Thank you Lord for your kindness."
Ten minutes gone by and the boy is still praying, keeping his head down.
The others look at each other surprised and his girlfriend is even more surprised than the others. She gets close to the boy and says in his ear, "I didn't know you were so religious."
The boy replies, "I didn't know your dad was a pharmacist!"
Wednesday, December 07, 2005
VIDEO: Amazing nature of Mother Nature
0 mts 24 secs
Corona
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
0 mts 57 secs
Noctiluminescent storm gathering in Talkeetna
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
Corona
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
0 mts 57 secs
Noctiluminescent storm gathering in Talkeetna
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
Tuesday, December 06, 2005
VIDEO: Passport Photo
0 mts 45 secs
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
Coincidence?
YEAR 1981
1. Prince Charles got married
2. Liverpool crowned champions of Europe
3. Australia lost the Ashes
4. Pope died.
YEAR 2005
1. Prince Charles got married
2. Liverpool crowned champions of Europe
3. Australia lost the Ashes
4. Pope died.
The next time Charles decides to marry, warn the pope!!
1. Prince Charles got married
2. Liverpool crowned champions of Europe
3. Australia lost the Ashes
4. Pope died.
YEAR 2005
1. Prince Charles got married
2. Liverpool crowned champions of Europe
3. Australia lost the Ashes
4. Pope died.
The next time Charles decides to marry, warn the pope!!
Monday, December 05, 2005
Philosophy and Courage
Legend has it that in 1987, a philosophy professor at Oxford University asked this question worth 50 points:
Question: What is courage?
A question assigned so many points would normally require an eight page essay answer backed up with source material, quotes and analytical reasoning. The answer written by the #1 ranked student:
Answer: This is courage.
Question: What is courage?
A question assigned so many points would normally require an eight page essay answer backed up with source material, quotes and analytical reasoning. The answer written by the #1 ranked student:
Answer: This is courage.
Beer, insect and reactions
Event : An insect falls into a mug of beer...
Reactions:
Englishman:
Throws his mug away and walks out
American:
Takes the insect out and drinks the beer
Chinese:
Eats the insect and throws the beer away
Japanese:
Drinks the beer with insect as it is coming free
Indian:
Sells the beer to the American and insect to the Chinese and gets a new
mug of beer.
Pakistani:
-Accuses the Indian for throwing insect into his beer
-Relates the issue to Kashmir
-Asks the Chinese for Military aid
-Takes a loan from the American to buy one more mug of beer
Reactions:
Englishman:
Throws his mug away and walks out
American:
Takes the insect out and drinks the beer
Chinese:
Eats the insect and throws the beer away
Japanese:
Drinks the beer with insect as it is coming free
Indian:
Sells the beer to the American and insect to the Chinese and gets a new
mug of beer.
Pakistani:
-Accuses the Indian for throwing insect into his beer
-Relates the issue to Kashmir
-Asks the Chinese for Military aid
-Takes a loan from the American to buy one more mug of beer
Sunday, December 04, 2005
VIDEO: Ogilvy film on Romania
0 mts 45 secs
STANDBY="Loading Windows Media Player components..." TYPE="application/x-oleobject">
WIDTH="320" HEIGHT="286" ShowControls="1" ShowStatusBar="0" ShowDisplay="0" autostart="0">
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
What's there not to love about Romania? Nothing, when Ogilvy & Mather is telling the story.
STANDBY="Loading Windows Media Player components..." TYPE="application/x-oleobject">
WIDTH="320" HEIGHT="286" ShowControls="1" ShowStatusBar="0" ShowDisplay="0" autostart="0">
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
What's there not to love about Romania? Nothing, when Ogilvy & Mather is telling the story.
Saturday, December 03, 2005
VIDEO: Mastercard Spoof - Indecent Proposal
1 mt 17 secs
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
Ridiculously funny take on Mastercard's "priceless" campaign. Don't miss it!
Click on the image above, and then click on play button once it becomes available.
Ridiculously funny take on Mastercard's "priceless" campaign. Don't miss it!
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