Q - In a pond there are 10 fish, one of them dies, and the water level of the pond increases. How?
A - The other 9 fish are crying.
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Q - A women goes in an Auto (rickshaw) and gets bald??? How???
A - Automatically ( Auto-Mein-Takli)
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Q - Once 5 Chhipkalis (house lizards) : Phulwa, RaamPyaari, RaamDulari,RaamPuri and RaamChuri were crawling on the wall when all of a sudden, Phulwa started to sing a song. The moment Phulwa stopped singing the song, RaamPyaari,RaamDulari, RaamPuri and RaamChuri fell down from the wall !!!... WHY ???
A - coz, they all started clapping !!!!
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Q - Gattu attends a lecture. After the lecture, he feels hungry, and goes to the canteen. In the canteen, he gets a pav. As soon as he picks it up to eat, he sees that his plate has "jannat" written on it. So, what's the name of the professor whose lecture Gattu just attended?
A - Ishq Ki Chhaon.
(Song - Jinke "Sir" ho "Ishq ki Chhaon", "Pav" ke neeche "Jannat" hogi....from the film "Dil Se")
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Q - What wud u call a Gal who never laughs?
A - HASINA !
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Q - Whatz a PJ ? Obviously "a poor joke". Whatz a (P + i J)?
A - "complex poor joke"
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Q - Why don't people laugh on a "complex poor joke" ?
A - Bcoz the joke part of it is imaginary.
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Q - You are in a boat in the middle of a river. You have 2 cigarettes and have to light any one cigarette. You don't have anything else with you in the boat? How will you do it?
A - Take one cigarette and throw it in the water. So the boat will become LIGHTER........using this LIGHTER you can light the other cigarette
Another deadly answer - You throw a cigarette up and catch it. Catches win Matches. Using the matches that you win, you can light the cigarette.
If that was not enough, one more deadly answer - Take water in your hand and drop it drop by drop...(TIP - TIP).
(Song - "TIP TIP barsa Pani. Pani ne aag lagayee. from the movie Mohra)
Light the cigarette with that fire.
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Q - A railway station beggar meets another beggar. A software engineer meets another software engineer. Both of them ask the same question to each other. What is the question?
A - "So, which platform are you working on?"